Days come and go but my feelings for you are forever- Jacoby Shaddix-

20

LITA

"I told you. Didn't I!? I fucking told you! But no you don't listen " Helena screamed in my ear

"Give it a rest already..... I'm an adult who needs to figure things out for herself like a big girl "

"He's no good for you! Wake the hell up! "

"I don't need you or anyone else telling me what's good or not good for me okay?"

"You know what. Don't fucking come to me for ANYTHING. "

"Perfectly fine by me because obviously you can't act like an adult anyways so bye"

I hung up I didn't want to hear anything else she had to say an I really didn't care either because I don't need added negativity in my life, I was dealing with enough stupid shit as it is. Stuff that I didn't really know how to go about dealing with because I had my hands full with Syler, touring with different bands at first but now I strictly work with Avenged and that was the other thing because Zacky hated that I'm with Jacoby. But now, I figured he was probably happy that Jacoby and I are having problems because he kept hope I'd split up with him.

I didn't want to believe the things that I'd heard because I wanted to see it for myself to be able to call him out I mean how can I blame him for something when I haven't seen it? But at the same time it wasn't just the cheating allegations it was his  alcohol problem as well. Don't get me wrong he's a good dad he does love his son but I wish he could put the bottle down, I know you shouldn't give up on people especially ones you love but what was I supposed to do? I knew I loved him obviously or I wouldn't have married him and I thought maybe deep down somewhere in his cold heart he loved me too. It has been months since he's been gone on tour once again which I was getting used to that by now, Him and I have been together so long and Syler  is already a year old.

I watched him playing with trucks and blocks on the floor of his playroom I smiled. How could I not? I had the most perfect little boy I could ever ask for, I was relieved in knowing he wouldn't ever meet my mom or dad but sad that his dad and I were turning out just like them. Tears started falling while Syler just looked at me trying to figure out what could be going on with mom, he just walked over to me plopping down then touched my face making noises then gave me a big wet kiss on my face which made me laugh and in return he did too.

We went about our day together setting up the Christmas tree finally because it was only a few days until Christmas and I couldn't wait because I was able to make it a great Christmas for Syler , that's all I cared about plus Jacoby was coming home tonight and I know his little boy misses the hell out of him. I missed him to I just hoped I could remain calm and not start a fight without knowing any facts, as far as I was concerned he hasn't cheated, the drinking problem I could deal with and try to be patient but cheating? I just don't know.

Hours later Syler was in bed I kept checking the time but it just got later and later I wondered where Jacoby was but every time I called he wouldn't answer the phone, of course a million things went through my mind. Was Helena telling the truth? But then again I wondered how she knew? I'm sure it brought her some sort of satisfaction because it's what she's been waiting for for a long time, first she hated the idea of it, then she loved it then she went back to telling me to leave him.  I decided to give him one last call I guess if they weren't coming back tonight then Syler would have to go to Matts house so his wife could watch him.

"Hello?"

"I didn't think you were going to Answer I've been calling all day, figured you guys were busy...."

He was quiet and seemed hesitant to talk

"Yeah. We were. Sorry babe I just..... im not all there uh. Can I call you back tomorrow?"