Because I Loved You

New Memories

I walked down the street with Harley next to me. She was looking around in wonder. People stared in horror and some in awe. I was afraid to touch her due to her having no memories of us. She saw a pet store and looked at me.

"Puddin, can I look at the animals?"

I nodded. She walked towards it and I followed. The owner panicked when we walked inside. I looked at him and shook my head. Lifting my hands and opening my jacket, I showed him that I had no weapons. He nodded and went behind the counter. I followed Harley around. A part of me was happy the way I have chosen to live. This way we weren't in danger. Harley looked at a kitten and gasped. I looked at the owner. He was standing there watching us.

"Harley, come on. We need to go." I looked at her. "I'll explain it to you later."

She looked at the kitten sadly but followed me towards the door. I stood in the doorway and turned my head to look at the owner. He was staring at me. I shook my head and walked out. Harley stood in the street, looking at me questioningly.

"These people don't trust me, Harley. I've done some bad things." I looked around.

"I trust you. I know you won't hurt me."

I smiled. "Thank you."

Harley smiled and hugged me. It surprised me. After a second, I hugged her back. She moved away and skipped away. Just like I remember. Sighing, I walked after her. This was going to be hard. Her not knowing who I am isn't something I can just live with. I want her to remember. I want her to know who I am. That wish, though, just wasn't going to be granted. She would only know me when I show her who I am. If I became bad again, would she disappear again? I couldn't take that chance. I just couldn't lose her again.

Harley stopped skipping and turned to me. "Puddin? You okay?"

"Of course. Let's go back to the hideout. I have something I want to show you."

"Okay!"

We walked back to the hideout and went to my office. I sat her on my desk and sat in my chair. Resting my elbows on the desk, I stared at Harley. She sat cross legged in the middle of my desk.

"You wanted to show me something?" Her voice was low and filled with confusion.

"Yes, I do, but I wanted to ask you something. You don't remember anything from before you fell asleep?"

"I remember the sound of a gun being fired, then darkness."

"Nothing else? A person maybe?"

She shook her head. "No, Puddin, I don't."

I sighed. This was hard. Harley crawled towards me. I took off my jacket and tossed it onto the couch. She looked at the jacket. Jumping off the desk, she went to the jacket and put on the jacket.

"This is warm. I see why you like it." She took it off and put it back on the couch. "Is that what you wanted to show me?"

I stood up. "No, Harley, it isn't."

I walked over to her and wrapped my arms around her waist. She looked up at me with fear filled eyes.

I leaned close to her. "You don't have to be afraid. I won't hurt you."

"You promise?"

"On death."

Harley smiled and kissed my lips softly. It brought back so many memories. So many things I want to happen but never will.

"Who is she?" Harley was staring into my eyes. "Your thinking of someone."

"She is someone I used to know a long time ago. A girl I lost."

"Where is she?"

"Lost in time."

I moved away and went to my room. Laying on the bed, I stared at the ceiling. She was really gone, and because I loved her I was giving her away to the unknown realm. It was time to forget.