Because I Loved You

Living on

It has been three months since I have lived without Harley. The effect has taken hold of me. I see her in everything. The air I breathe smells like her. The streets I walk remind me of the streets we walked together. I haven't killed anyone. There was no joy in it. No passion. I assume she's living happily with the baby I helped to create. I assume she has forgotten about me. Walking into the apartment I have purchased as my own, I slam the door shut. Because I loved her I have moved on. Because I loved her I have forgotten what it was like to hold her. These things have disappeared from my mind. I have banished them. Rid them clean. There was a knock at the door. I went to answer it, but my mind told me not to even bother. Still, I answered it. A man in a suit fitted to his form stood just outside my doorway. I questioned his existence. What did he want with me? Why did he even come knocking?

"Joker?" He stared me in the eye, unafraid that I was a known criminal. "I have come to ask you a few questions."

"Please come in."

I don't know why I bothered. It didn't matter to me. Nothing did anymore. The man in the fancy suit stepped inside and walked to my living room. He sat down on the couch. I closed the door and pulled up a chair. The man cut to the chase.

"When was the last time you saw Harley Quinn?" The man took out a note pad and a pen from his pocket.

"Three months ago." My voice was dead. I had no desire for this.

"Was she being targeted by anyone?"

"No."

The man nodded and wrote something down. "Had she gotten into trouble?"

"She's a criminal. She's always in trouble."

The man sighed. "Harley Quinn has gone missing and we need your help."

I shook my head. "I am of no help. She doesn't need me anymore."

"Well, if you change your mind, here's my card. Give me a call."

The man handed me a card and left. I stared at it for days. Food didn't satisfy me. Water didn't quench my thirst. I was nothing. The card screamed at me. I refused to listen.

"Daddy, help us."

I closed my eyes. Get out of my head. You don't belong here. I am nothing to the both of you. Still. I opened my eyes and stared at the number for the millionth time. Standing up, I dropped the card to the floor. I went to the phone and dialed the number I had memorized. The man answered immediately.

"Hello?"

"I have your answer."

The man's line crackled. "And that is?"

"I'll help."

"Good. I'll see you tomorrow at midnight on the corner by your apartment."

He hung up. I replaced the phone and stared at it. This was all because I loved her. If not, I would never help her.