Queen

I'm Sorry

Chapter 20 | I'm Sorry

He turned his eyes back to Sabrina yet again and had to fight the reflex to wipe away Sabrina's tears. "Hey Sabrina." Carter could barely utter the words without his heart fluttering. He couldn't deny the love he had for Sabrina. She was his first girlfriend, his first love, and the first girl he brought to his mother's favorite place. In his heart, Sabrina would always be the love of his life, whether he wanted to accept it or not.

"Hi Carter," Sabrina responded wiping her tears with the back of her hand. She was happy that she avoided the option of putting make-up on because it would've been ruined before Carter would've had a chance to see her. "How have you been?"

"I've been fine. How about you?"

"I've been okay, could be better." Yeah, if you didn't kill my fucking child. Carter thought to himself as he did a onceover on Sabrina. Even with swollen eyes, he couldn't deny her beauty. He knew that there wasn't anything in the world that could detriment how beautiful she was. It was always something about a black woman's skin that always got Carter to stop and take a second look.

"That's good." Carter said in return instead of what he actually wanted to say. Carter let out a breath before running his hand over his face yet again. "We have a lot to talk about Sabrina but truthfully, whether we talk about it or not. It's not going to change how I feel about you right now." Carter said truthfully. He didn't know what Sabrina could say to save whatever they had going on.

"Carter it's not like I wanted to have the abortion. I was trying to wait for you to come back so we can talk and decide what to do together, but then you never showed up and I was going into the second trimester and I didn't want to start showing or anything. I truly regret everything that happened while you were gone." Carter put his hand over his mouth at the thought of Sabrina having sex with Chris but couldn't even imagine Sabrina laying with another man. Carter thought he'd been the one that would've fucked up, but it was the very opposite. "But Carter I really want us to try again. I know I fucked up and you probably won't ever trust me again, but I promise everything is going to different this time." Sabrina pleaded at the brisk of tears. She didn't want to lose one of the best things that she'd ever had. To her, Carter was the perfect guy and still couldn't quite grasp the idea of her cheating on him when he provided everything she needed and more.

"Sabrina, I can't. Well, at least not now. I need time because what you did was honestly the worst thing that has ever happened to me and I don't know if I could truly forgive you for killing the life inside you. You cheating on me is on a whole other level because that could be forgiven after a brief talk but an abortion? Really Sabrina? I don't wish this pain amount of pain on even my worst enemy. So as far as it being an Us; that's not something that can guarantee you at this moment. I'm sorry." With that Carter stood up with a sigh and walked over to wear Sabrina was sitting. He bent down and placed a burning kiss into her cheek before standing upright again. "Jaz, let's go." Carter said loud enough for Jaz to hear him in the kitchen. "Bye Brina."

Carter made hias way to the front door without looking back to check on Sabrina. He wanted his brain and his heart to understand that she was no longer his concern. He was halfway to Jaz's car before Jaz caught up with him in the parking lot.

"So, what's gonna happen between you two?" Jaz asked genuinely interested to figure out what Carter decided. He slightly regretted distracting Chance, thus distracting himself, so they wouldn't listen in on a private matter.

"I can't be in a relationship with her Jaz... can't even look at her without thinking about how she'd look with a big belly and a ring on her finger."

"Maybe it just wasn't the right time for you guys."

Carter shrugged, "Maybe not."

:

Sabrina continued to watch the front door hoping that Carter would change his mind and walk back inside. She knew she had false hope and that she'd be lucky if Carter ever looked her way again.

"Sabrina I'm not trying to be rude but you need to get out." Chance stated cutting into Sabina's thoughts. Chance fixed her sports bra as she watched Sabrina get up from the chair and slowly pick up her stuff.

"Thank you Chance for letting me talk to him in your apartment." Sabrina said after gathering all of her stuff into her hand.

"You're fine. I don't hate you Sabrina but what you did was unnecessary. I'm not saying you have the child and ruin your future but you could've at least called him to run it by him or called me so I could help in the situation in any way that I could but you did it all on your own." Chance opened the door for Sabrina and watch her make her way to the door. "Wish you the best." Chance said curtly as Sabrina walked through the door and closed the door behind her.

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"It's painful to say goodbye to someone that you don't want to let go. But it's more painful to ask someone to stay if you know they really want to go." -Anonymous

This chapter was hard for me to write because I love them together but some things can't work themselves out.

Stick around for the epilogue ;)

Muah, Bea