What is Freedom?

Week 'Til Holiday- Part Two

~Three Days~

It was early morning, and I sat in the corner of my room, paying no mind to my bleeding knuckles from when I'd punched the mirror. I stared into the darkness ahead of me, my head reeling. I could still feel the chill of my monsterous form as it refused to leave me.It was a while staring into the darkness before I slipped into unconciousness, nightmares instantly consuming me.

It was cold there. Cold and dark. A combination of things that describe my mind as well as a number of places. In this case, it was Joutenheim, and I was on the throne, crowned as their King. I looked down at my hands which were blue, just like the rest of me. From a doorway came two guards, dragging a prisoner, who was pushed to his knees in front of me. He looked up to me with his striking blue eyes.

"Why, if it isn't the Prince of Asgard.."I found myself saying with a smirk. "What has brought you here?"

It was not Thor but a guard that answered me. "We found him trying to break into the castle, quite literally, with his hammer."

"There were Joutens in our weapons vault!" the Prince interjected. "You broke the truce, and I came to find out why!" 

I smirked and stepped down from the Throne and stood in front of the Prince. "As if you are not breaking the truce by being here yourself? You of all people should know the consiquenses of trespassing, Son of Odin!" I held out my hand, and a guard placed an ice dagger in my hand. "There are places, weak points, in everything, even your palace." I chuckled lightly.

Just before the dagger plunged through his heart, I awoke. I was not in my corner, I was standing. In the place of the ice dagger was my own dagger, and in place of Thor was the wall. What had happened? Sleepwalking was not a word to describe this. Sleepmurdering? Only, it was a wall, thank Valhalla, and not my brother that had been stabbed, so not real murder was comitted. It scared me, though, that I did this without knowing. What if next time it wasn't a wall? It was then that I heard knocking on my door, but I didn't respond. 

"Loki?" came Thor's voice before more knocking. "Loki, are you okay?! I heard something all the way down in my room; are you okay?!" The concern in his voice grew with every word. Finally he just opened the door. He must have noticed the damage I'd done to my room, for he whispered, "Gods..." to himself as he made his way over to me. He grabbed my hand nad pulled the knife out of the wall, and then out of my hand, setting it aside. "Loki, what happened? Why did you have a dagger?" 

I didn't move, didn't speak. I couldn't bring myself to do anything. Even if I wanted to do anything, I wouldn't have been able to.

Thor's hand rested on my shoulder, and he looked me in the eyes, even though my eyes were focused on where the knife had been. "Brother, please say something!" He shook me a little. "Loki, speak to me!" He was shaking me harder. "Please! Loki!"

But it was too late. I had zoned out. I was trapped in my mind once again.

~Two Days~

It was noon before I had been able to snap myself out of my mind. I looked around. The room was even more so trashed than before, and I didn't understand why. I looked at Thor, who was sat beside me, looking exhausted and powerless.

"Thor..?" I muttered, my voice a bit rough from misuse over the past hours.

He looked at me and immediately pulled me into an embrace. "Thank Valhalla," he said, his voice cenveying his relief. "I thought you'd stay like that forever... You scared me. Just when I though you were back, you'd start mumbling this nonsence, acting like there were people there, like they were trying to hurt you.. You started throwing things at one point and... Gods, you scared me.."