120 days of Summer

Day 5

The day after was a nightmare. My body was in pain-mentally and physically. I was broken and no one could fix that. Only fear was inside my head and the mean thoughts kept screaming. In any moment I could scream on them but I've tried not to. I couldn't afford myself to open up to someone, it's too much stuff to deal with. My mind kept thinking about Austin,about his smell,about his warm body but I knew that the chance he would like someone like me was near to zero. Because I had a job to do the bad feelings stayed quite in one corner of my brain.
Today we had day off and I could take a trip to Seattle and enjoy myself. The weather was pretty nice and there were a cool breeze that matched the day. To let my mind a rest I've decided to call Sky and go for a shopping.

Sky,I'm in the city. Want to shop with me?yes! I've waited you to call

We decided to meet in one park and then go whenever the wind take us. Sky came really fast and we started to walk where our leg's took us. "Where did you go yesterday?","I didn't feel so good so I went back to my bus". More excuses,like always. "I thought that you and Austin been dirty",because my face was surprised she started to laugh and explained herself. "You went outside and Austin went after you when we were screaming like idiots ","well, Austin was drunk and started to say bullshit,after that I don't know what happened because I went to sleep". She was quite for a while and stated at her feet. "You want something with him? But be honest ", inside my head I knew the answer but I couldn't be honest in 100%. "I really don't know. He seems to be very nice guy but it's only fan crush,nothing serious ",again she nodded. "If you want help with boy's, call me ", "of course!",and again we laughed. The pain inside was too much for me so I've decided to trust Sky and tell her everything.
"Sky,I need someone to talk to", "always babe".It felt like I can trust her. "I feel like shit", "what happened?", for the next hour I found myself telling this girl my life and she just stared at the floor, keeping quite. "Please help me... ",a whisper released from my mouth. "I'll always be there for you. You the first human being I feel I can trust on,and to be honest we are not so different". We talked for hours, she told me her story and I told her mine. "I can't believe that tomorrow I'll leave Seattle and you...","don't worry.I'm not going anywhere, from now we will be together".
Her words was so comforting, but I was afraid that she will leave me,but somehow she could read me like an open book.
For the first time in the last four years I found a friend who will bring me up whenever I'll be down.