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Chapter 37: Maya

We get back on the road after a couple hours of dress choosing and trip planning.

All these things bore me. I know everything that matters to her in appearance, looks. I bet he's rich and that must be the only reason she's into him. She's too dense in her state now to be able to love someone again.

But seeing her like this, happy, smiling, it just got me wondering what if she really does like him? What if she really did learn to love again? Then why would she love him and not love me?

That's probably why I thought she couldn't possibly love Harvey because it would be too humanely selfish to love him when I've been waiting for her love and support ever since Dad's death.

As we drive back home all, I look out are the passing trees that seem to get redder by each passing day. Fall is coming, and with that the cold weather. Everyone knows after fall is winter and winter is the season I hate the most.

I plug in my earplugs and listen to Soul Fazed by Jessica Hart. Anything to keep my mind off this wedding and talk about family.

The space in the car only seems to narrow as we make our ascent up the little hill leading to my house. I appreciate Mother's brief period of silence as we do so and just absorb myself into my music.

Cale pops into my mind and I feel my chest tighten immediately. I really don't know what to think. Are we even together? My cheeks flush red as I recall the kiss he gave me back in the woods. I really wasn't expecting it. I don't know what I was expecting but especially not that. I was right in the middle of scolding him too. I'm still mad about the fact that he still hasn't told me what happened, especially if he admitted to trusting me.

I haven't told him my situation either, now that I think about it.

I sigh.

In the end we're the same.

Me: Gigi can you come over tonight?

After a few mere seconds I feel my phone buzz in my hand and I quickly open up the text.

Gigi: I'm on my way.

I find myself lightly smiling at my phone. The sense of reassurance and safety that only Gigi gives me is especially powerful in this moment where all I feel is despair over too many things at once.

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Hey guys! Sorry I haven't updated in a while! Lots of school and work and finally I finished a chapter although it's pretty short. Next one should be a little longer.

Anyways, what do you think so far?

Anything I can improve in this chapter?

Song: Jessica Hart - Soul Fazed