Dragged to my knees

Chapter 26

Last chapter!! Yayy

*Does happy Dance* the starts sobbing.

Y'all already think I'm maybe sorta crazy so i didn't think you would mind that. Lol

Okay so I'm actually excited to have gotten this far but there' s a tiny part of me that didn't want it to end simply because I love Ricky and all the support you guys have given me so far. Y'all are the best!

After I upload this chapter, I'll have to do a tiny bit of editing, nothing major though, so don't worry. It'll pretty much be the same. Except maybe I'll make Veronica wake up before dying, nothing major though.

Okay, enough of my ramblings, here's the cliché last chapter even though it's pretty short. Enjoy!

Mum's asleep when i get back so I go up into my room and freshen up.

 What a day it's been already, I think to myself reminiscing the happening of the morning. Picking up my aunt's locket off my bedside table, I decide to put in in the drawer where I usually just dump things. When I open it up however, I spot Kenny's cards and letters. The ones I never read but toss in there instead. I replay Mrs. Susan's words in my head as I pick up a recent letter. Opening it up, I begin to read.

"To my Dear son Jericho,

I want to apologize to you from the depths of my soul for how my actions became so totally out of control, resulting in tremendous hurt to you and Samantha. I was making horrible choices and heading down a path of selfish self-destruction that ultimately cost me everyone and everything I had in my life, most importantly you and Samantha. I was abusing my prescription medications in huge amounts, and other times drinking in excess which often led to me hitting you severely without a cause.

You have every right to be angry at me and very hurt. I take total responsibility for all of my behavior and believe me I have had all these years alone with only my thoughts and absolute feelings of remorse and regret for everything I did, starting back when you were about six with my infidelities and staying gone from home for days at a time. I managed to drive you away in the process without intending to.

Thank God Samantha was there for you and she loved you and raised you when I chose to be absent. The guilt I feel over this cannot even be put into words. That was precious time I wasted away when I should have been with you and Samantha. God I wish I could go back in time and do things differently, but this is real life and that is not possible.

I will never forget when you were standing in your bedroom door at the house and you told me "I don't like who you've become!"

You were absolutely right, and I was so far-gone. I NEVER, EVER stopped loving you though, and I love you now and miss you so much it hurts, and it tears me up to know how I broke your heart and lost your trust. I will love you for as long as I live Jericho, even if you hate me.

I am so very sorry for everything and especially for not being there for you. They say that out of only true remorse comes the determination to better oneself from the experience and make a life change.

I can promise you that I am doing just that. I'm taking care of a lot of medical problems that I have been avoiding and doing a major attitude adjustment. I have mellowed out quite a bit. If there is any way you can find it in your heart to forgive me it would mean the world to me Jericho, but I understand and respect your decision if you can't.

I know "I'm sorry" will not fix anything or make it ok. I would hate for us to have no closure with this at all if anything was to happen. Again, I am very proud of what a fine young man you're turning out to be. I think about you every day and wonder and wonder what your life is like now.

Kenny."

Wow, I think, re-reading the letter. My hands are shaking slightly and a lump has grown into the vacuum in my esophagus. The tears which have been building up begin to flow slowly as I recall memories from my past and try to put myself in my father's shoes. Yes, it was hell for me but he lost a lot as well.

All he is doing is trying to make amends and I think that at least accounts for something. It's correcting the mistakes we make in life that matters, isn't it?

Picking up my cell, I dial with shaky fingers. Maybe this isn't a good idea; I think when he doesn't pick up on the third ring. I should cut the call now before it's too late.

"Ricky?" his deep, rich voice fills my ears, pulling me out of my thoughts.

"Oh, Uhm, Kenny." I stutter, trying to count my words. "I was wondering if you wanted to meet up later to talk and I feel like there's a lot we need to talk about and sort through."

His voice comes off sounding choked with emotions of relief and anxiety, hope and excitement.

"You have no idea how long I've been waiting to hear those exact words." He says.

THE END