Gilbert the Messiah : The Goldfish Testament

Chapter 6: The Night Ride

 Gilbert awoke again at 8:30 am. This was because he heard the sexy voice of Morgan Freeman shouting. "Gilby! Get the fuck up! They are here! You must escape while you still can!" Morgan than grabbed Gilbert and pulled him down the stairs of the amazing mountain school house, and to the curb of the street. "I've already called an Uber! They should be here any minute, I'll hold them off" Morgan then turned around a grabbed a gigantic sword. He leaped over the building to the other side where the attackers were attacking from. Gilbert sat at the curb, but then he heard a car screech around the corner as a slick black car stopped in front of him.

"Are you the Messiah?!" A voice said. Gilbert nodded. "Then, jump in my car!" Gilbert did so. In the car, Gilbert realized who the driver was. It was...... SCREECH. The car made a loud screech as it sped up and drove away from the house. Helicopters started following them and began shooting. Gilbert screamed. He then looked towards the driver to see if his eyes fooled him, or if it was actually him. IT WAS. It was the one and only DAVID HASSELHOFF, or as some call him, The Hoff. "You ready Messiah, for the most kick-ass escape?!" Gilbert nodded. The car picked up speed and began dodging the bombs and bullets.

Cars drove up next to them, and gun-men began shooting at them. The Hoff pulled up his bullet-proof windows, the bullets bounced off and shot the shooters. The Hoff noticed many people up ahead were blocking off the road to their escape. He engaged auto-pilot, then jumped out of the sun roof and began punching the villains to death. He ripped off his shirt releasing his glorious twelve-pack. He pulled out his machine gun and shot up more thugs and cars. The car then drove up to The Hoff as he jumped in. They then took a sharp turn and drove off the nearest cliff, however, instead of sinking, the car transformed into a boat. Gilbert sat there in shock trying to see if he was dreaming, but then he was splashed in the face with water and knew that this was no dream. Gilbert began to tense up.

"Relax kid, I've know what I'm doing." The Hoff said, but right after he said this, he crashed into a rock. The boat bounced up into the sky and a turned into a jet. Gilbert thought they had escaped, but soon a large amount of enemy jets flew in. "Okay," The Hoff said, "This may need some more planning." The Hoff then pressed a button. "How about some music to calm the mood."

Music began playing.

At first I was afraid, I was petrified,

Kept thinking I could never live without you by my side

But then I spent so many nights thinking how you did me wrong,

And I grew strong, and I learned how to get along.

And so you're back from outer space.

I just walked in to find you here with that sad look upon your face

I should have changed that stupid lock

I should have made you leave your key

If I had known for just one second you'd be back to bother me

Go on now, go. Walk out the door

Just turn around now 'cause you're not welcome anymore

Weren't you the one who tried to hurt me with goodbye?

Did you think I'd crumble?

Did you think I'd lay down and die?

Oh, no, not I!

I will survive.

Oh, as long as I know how to love I know I'll stay alive.

I've got all my life to live.

I've got all my love to give.

And I'll survive,

I will survive, hey, hey.

It took all the strength I had not to fall apart.

Kept trying hard to mend the pieces of my broken heart.

And I spent, oh, so many nights just feeling sorry for myself.

I used to cry but now I hold my head up high.

And you see me somebody new.

I'm not that chained-up little person still in love with you.

And so you felt like dropping in,

And just expect me to be free.

And now I'm saving all my loving for someone who's loving me.

[2x]

Go on now, go. Walk out the door.

Just turn around now 'cause you're not welcome anymore.

Weren't you the one who tried to break me with goodbye?

Did you think I'd crumble?

Did you think I'd lay down and die?

Oh, no, not I!

I will survive.

Oh, as long as I know how to love I know I'll stay alive.

I've got all my life to live.

I've got all my love to give.

And I'll survive,

I will survive.

"There," The Hoff said, "Relaxing." The mayhem continued as they dodged multiple enemies.

Meanwhile.

Morgan Freeman leaped into the sky with a giant mecha-sword, and stabbed it into a helicopter. He sliced and chopped and began a giant blood-bath as carnage flew every where all over the mountain. He was fighting for nearly 5 minutes, when he was tazed in the back of his neck and brought to his knees. A man with a bat ran up and hit Morgan unsuspectedly in-between the eyes. Morgan Freeman blacked out as his face began to bleed. Two henchmen threw Morgan Freeman into a trash bag and threw him onto a helicopter. The helicopter flew away in the opposite direction of the Hoff and the Messiah.

Speaking of The Hoff and The Messiah

Their jet flew and did loops and stuff, but it was soon shot right in the engine, and began to plummet from the sky. As they drew closer to the ground, The Hoff began to sing.

"I WILL SURVIVE" The Hoff was screaming, "I WILL SURVIVE!" Gilbert began to join the sing/screaming. The power of the song was so powerful, that it awoke Jesus from his deep sleep. Jesus noticed that his son was in danger and quickly arose to rescue him. He zapped a majestic Jesus beam at all of the villainous enemies and levitated the car-jet thing to a safe road. "Our prayers have been answered!" The Hoff shouted. They continued driving to the safe-house.

Meanwhile

Morgan woke up in the back of a truck. The helicopter switched the cargo with the truck a couple of minutes ago. A masked man walked up to him. "Hey," he said, "We know you're hiding the Messiah, and we will figure out where you put him, I don't care if we have to kill you for the answer." The masked man then put a sack over Morgan's head and hit him with another metal bat multiple times.

Back to the Messiah

The safe house was a cave hidden in a mountain with a path leading to the entrance. The Hoff drove his car in to the parking lot. He and Gilbert jumped out and walked to the secret entrance in the cave. The Hoff typed a code into a keypad, and an elevator picked them up and took them to the secret lair of the followers of the Messiah.