Chapter 20
Nick was on cloud nine. He couldn’t have imagined how amazing it could feel to be honest with yourself and the person you care about. There was nothing standing in their way when it came to each other. Neither knew what was waiting for them out there in the real world but when it came to each other there was no more running. For the first time since Nick could remember life he felt safe. There in Shane’s arms and presence he felt protected and hoped Shane felt the same way.
Over the next several hours they talked and sometimes more than talked.
“We should probably get back home.” Shane suggested, his mouth still kissing at Nick’s neck. “Julienne’s been worried about you.”
Nick was dizzy with lust and couldn’t honestly recall what Shane had just said. He had his hand buried under Shane’s shirt and let his hands feast on the beautiful sculpted body hidden beneath those pesky clothes.
“Nick, did you hear me?” Shane lifted his head, his blue eyes were several shades darker.
“Yeah sure whatever you want.” He plastered his mouth against Shane’s and kissed him with all his might. It didn’t matter they had been making out and feeling each other up for the last few hours, it wasn’t enough. Nick didn’t think it’d ever be enough.
Shane’s control wasn’t much better even though he was the most experienced between the two of them. He gave in a hundred percent to the kiss, his mouth just as feverish and hungry.
They stilled when a cellphone rang. “It’s yours.” Nick figured out first.
“Right.” Shane untangled himself from Nick and reached inside his pants pocket to fish out the phone. “It’s Michael.” He contemplated not answering and grabbing Nick again but he didn’t have the heart to leave his brother hanging. “Hello?”
“Finally.” Michael said around a sigh of annoyance. “Julienne’s been trying Nick for the last half hour and this is my third call to you.”
“Really?” He hadn’t heard the phone before now. “I think Nick has his off.” He looked at the boy in question and watched while Nick searched for his own cellphone. It was on the car floor and indeed off.
“Does that mean you’re together?” Michael asked next, his annoyance quickly gone and replaced by something Shane could only describe as evocative. “It has been a few hours since you left. I thought you were somewhere crying your eyes out but it sounds like some other type of crying out is going on.”
Shane blushed and hated that he had done so. “Shut up.” he was never as comfortable as Michael talking about sex.
“Should we send out rescue teams or is everything ok?”
Shane stared at Nick who was curious about what they were talking about. “It’s better than ok.”
“Aww my brother and my girlfriend’s best friend this is all so sweet.”
“You can be an ass, do you know that?”
Michael laughed. “Yeah, yeah, stop talking to this ass and go get a piece of ass.” He hung up.
Shane hoped he wasn’t the shade of a ripe tomato. “They won’t worry about us anymore.” He replaced the phone back inside his pocket. Now that more than a minute had passed giving them to breathe Shane wasn’t sure what he should be doing next.
Nick looked flushed but also back in his right mind with his lust tucked securely away. “We should get out of here before some sea creature decides to have us for dinner.” The sun was already setting and every minute it was getting darker.
They agreed to leave Shane’s car and pick it up tomorrow. They didn’t want to be away from each other as long as it would take to drive back home. “Speaking of dinner are you hungry?” he hadn’t eaten anything all day.
Nick flashed a dazzling smile Shane’s way before focusing his eyes back on the rode. “For you or for food?”
Shane smiled like a kid in a candy store, it felt amazing to have Nick opening flirting with him. He was terrified Nick would back away again and come up with yet another reason they couldn’t be together. “Food…for now.”
“I haven’t had any sugar today so the answer is yes.”
Nick drove them to a drive thru fast food joint where they placed their orders and decided to park and eat their food. They were both on the same page about wanting to spend time with each other with no one else interrupting. The car was their safe haven until they could get back to their apartment.
It was Nick who broke the silence first. “This feels surreal.”
“I know what you mean.” Shane’s heart had stopped racing since the first kiss Nick planted on him earlier.
“I’m kinda worried you’ll regret it.” Nick busied himself with pulling the pickles free from his burger.
“I’ve been trying for weeks to get you to give us a chance, why would I regret it?” Shane ignored his food and focused only on Nick’s face. These were the types of talks they needed to have in order for their relationship to have a healthy start.
“Because you could do better?” Nick shrugged. “You’re this amazing perfect guy with an amazing family, you do well in school, and you look like you stepped out of the pages of GQ or something. I can’t think of something about you that isn’t perfect.” He was feeling inadequate.
“No.” Shane reached across and took his hand securely in his. “I’m not perfect, I’m far from it. We all make mistakes Nick.”
“My parents didn’t want me, my aunt and uncle hate me. You don’t understand what it is to hate yourself.”
Shane heart sank. “Yes I do. It’s not your fault; it’s theirs for not willing to see how amazing you are. The same way it wasn’t my fault for what happened with Scott. I blamed myself for a long time, years.”
Nick’s resolve lessened as his shoulders fell and he returned Shane’s stare. “What happened? Scott’s the guy from the grill right, your ex?”
Shane didn’t like talking about this but he knew he had to be honest with Nick because it’d help their relationship strengthen. “Yeah. We dated for a long time, I loved him and I let that love cloud what I knew was right and wrong. I blamed myself all the time like you’re doing now. I felt like I wasn’t good enough for so long, too long. Abusers are never right Nick.”
He understood what Shane was saying even though he couldn’t say the words. “I used to tell Julienne all the time the problem was never with us but with the other person because they didn’t know how to fix what’s wrong in their own lives.”
“You’re right and now you need to believe it for yourself. It’s their loss not having you in their lives. I don’t want it to be my loss. I meant everything I said today and then some.” Shane confessed. “You have to stop thinking you’re not enough because to me you’re pretty damn perfect too.”
Nick nodded and offered the best smile he could with all the emotion welling up behind his eyes. “We should eat this before it gets too cold. I didn’t get to say it earlier but I love you too.”
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Secrets are my Sanity
Romance(MxM) Nick was used to hiding his secret, one he didn't even admit to himself, but then he's partnered with Shane Gregory for a project and everything he's tried to hide comes crashing down around him. Spinoff to Sanity Siphoned; Michael and Julienn...
