Him or Her? // Joshler

Chapter 3: Do You Feel It?

I woke up and Jenna was already out of bed. When I walked into the kitchen, I saw her making eggs and bacon.
"Morning babe," I smiled and kissed her cheek as I walked to the kitchen table.
"Here's your breakfast," she says, placing a plate in front of me, "So what's the plan for today?"
I took a piece of bacon and thought for a second.
"We could invite Josh and Mark over. And whoever else you want."
"Okay, I'll text them and tell them to come over around 6:00," She nodded.

We spent the rest of the day cleaning up, shopping for dinner and snacks, and watching her favorite TV shows. Six o'clock came around and people began to arrive. Jenna had invited three of her friends along with Mark and Josh. Once everyone was there, we put in a movie and started eating on the couches. We picked out "Breakfast Club" so we could passively watch and talk at the same time.
I sandwiched myself between Josh and Jenna, and for most of the movie Josh and I were just talking to each other. When the movie was over, Jenna took her friends and Mark up to the game room to show them the new games we bought. Josh had already seen most of them, so he and I went out to the backyard.
"So I have an idea for a new song," I say as we sat down in a two person hammock.
"Sick," Josh says, situating himself so that we were facing each other.
I told him about the fragments of lyrics I had thought of, and I sang a little of the tune I envisioned.
"I like it a lot," He says, grinning.
"I know you do," I grinned.
"Tyler," Josh looked up at me curiously, "how do you do that? How do you just orchestrate lyrics and melodies together like that- so effortlessly?"
I blushed a little, grateful it was darkish  outside so he couldn't see.
"I don't know... I just turn my thoughts into words? I don't know how to explain it," I shrug.
He looked up at the sky for a moment with a puzzled look.
"You know what the most amazing thing about your songs is?" he turned towards me, "The way you manipulate those thoughts. Like-I don't know... you don't always just say 'here's my thoughts'. You make it so someone would have to really listen to understand what you're saying. I don't get how you do it."
I was really blushing now.
"Stop it...," I grinned and looked into his eyes.
"I'm serious, dude," he smiled back and met my eyes.
I sat there for a moment looking into his eyes and for a second my eyes fluttered to his lips. I quickly looked back up to his eyes. Our faces are inches apart. I can feel the intensity of my gaze but I can't stop. I feel like his gaze is meeting the intensity of mine... no I'm imagining things. It feels like our faces are getting closer. Did his eyes just flit to my lips? I feel my face move forward by a millimeter.
He blinks hard and shifts back slightly.
"Tyler-" he begins.
"I'm sorry," I interrupt him and mentally scratch the skin off of my face.
"Did we...," he trails off, hoping that I'll finish his thought.
"I don't know," I bite my lip with a little too much force.
We sit in silence for a small moment.
"Did you...," I begin warily, "Did you feel that?"
He looks at me, ever so slightly startled, "Feel what?" He looks like he knows what I'm getting at, but doesn't want to say it.
"You know...," I trail off, searching for anything to describe what I'm screaming to say, "That feeling. That moment. Was it just me?"
He sits up. "I don't know," he sighs and looks at me. I can't tell if there's longing or discomfort in his eyes.
"We should join the rest of them," I snap out of it and get out of the hammock.
We walk back inside and I join Jenna and her friends at the table. Josh sits with Mark on the couch, who's watching football.
"Hey," Jenna says to me as I take my seat next to her.
"Hey."
"Uh... you good?" She squints at me.
"Yeah, what are y'all up to?" I quickly revert the conversation and ask the group.
She gives me a look of distrust but doesn't say anything else about it for the rest of the night.
Around eleven o'clock, everyone starts to leave. Josh is the last one out of the door.
"Bye," I say, standing in the doorway as he walks to his car.
"Bye," he replies. He doesn't hug me.
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this chapter was really challenging to write. any thoughts/comments/criticism??