What would Rammstein say...if they were stoned?
(Scene: the Rammies are at an autograph signing. Till appears unusually effervescent as a fan approaches him.)
Till: Hhhhiiiii....autograph your ass-? Ssuuuure- Buck Dich! *Giggle* Get it? Fffllocka, you got any Cheesy Poofs...?
Flake: Till, you're signing my hand again...
Till: Oopsie! *Giggle* (To fan.) Ooookayyy...here we go...um, what was your name again-? Igor-? Now, do you want it over or under the tattoo of the decomposing zombie-?
Flake (Tapping Olli on the shoulder): Olli...do you know what's going on...?
Olli: Well, Flocka, from what I understand, a certain fan from Seattle felt that Till lost too much weight at the beginning of the tour, so she Fed-exed him five kilos of brownies.
Flake: You mean, 'brownies'...?
Olli: Ja, 'brownies'...
Flake: Ah hah. Then, might I assume, from the fact Richard's eyes resemble two peeled eggs, Doom just signed someone's CD with the first 14 stanzas of the Rubaiyat of Omar Khayam, and Paul has been singing '99 Luftballoons' nonstop the past two hours, that Till has been-?
Olli: -Sharing the wealth, yes.
Flake:...Speaking of whom, where'd he go-?
Till (From under the table): 'Komm mit mir/Komm auf mein Schloss'... *Giggle*
Fan: Um...Herr Lorenz...Herr Lindemann has my daughter's doll...
Flake: Oh, scheiss...(Crawls under table.) Till, give the little girl back her doll.
Till: NO! MY dollie!
Little Girl: Waaaaahhh!!
Richard: Awwww...don' cry, li'l girlie...I gots a stuffed bunny rabbits I will let you have...Flake...where's Mr. Bun-Bun-?
Flake: *Sigh* You haven't had Mr. Bun-Bun since you were seven, Richard...
Richard: What?!?! Someone stole Mr. Bun-Bun?!?! Waaaaaahh!!!
Little Girl: Waaaaaahhh!!
Doom: Whooo gots the Cheesy Poofs-?
Paul: ...You're a Cheesy Poof! *Giggle* '...99 Luftballons/Auf ihrem Weg zum Horizont...'
(A large hand holding a doll appears from under the table.)
Till (In high squeaky voice): Dollie don't like that song! (Wallops Paul with dollie.) Dollie likes Siouxie Sioux!
Paul: ...'She's your little voodoo dolly/and she's gonna make you lazy/like the little drum in your ear'...
Doom: *Giggle* 'Voodoo Dolly'...I gets it!
Till: Hey! Hey! Let's pretend it's Ursula von der Leyen and stick pins in her!
Little Girl: Waaaaahhh!!!
Richard: Waaaaaahhh!!!
Doom: Aww, here li'l girl, we gots brownies!
Flake: Gah! NOOO!! (Grabs brownies from Doom.) Here, Olli, hide these!
Olli: Oookey dokey... (Smiles broadly and slips under the table.)
Flake: *Sigh* Oh, well...(Slips under table.)
Doom: Hey! Flake's here! Yay!
Till: Lookie, Flocka, I got a dollie!
Little Girl: Waaaahhh!!!
Richard: *Snif* I wants Mr. Bun-Bun...
Paul: 'Hab' nen Luftballon gefunden/Denk' an Dich und lass' ihn fliegen'...
YOU ARE READING
What would Rammstein say?
Fanfictionjust a random funny stuff where the writer imagined a lot of funny scenes played by our belovers All rights are for the owner "tillsdoppelganger"
