Cold Fury [DISCONTINUED]

10. Phil is deaf

*present day*

We had a great time. Honestly, when I first started YouTube, I never thought we would make it this far. I mean, we have our own documentary on YouTube Red! And our song is on the charts, higher than many professional artists! All thanks to you guys. Phil and I were just wondering if we deserved you precious beans.

Obviously, there were bad times, too. Example? THE FUCKING AIRPORT INCIDENT! I'll never forget that. And now I think I have a soft spot for pistachio muffins. They are super tasty. If you don't know how I nearly blinded myself, I've put the video up there. So just sit back and enjoy my suffering.

Today was a normal day. I was on my laptop, sitting in my infamous sofa crease while sipping Red Bull. Phil was watching Law and Order on TV, the show that inspired me to take up Law, along with Legally Blonde. I was on my laptop, not because I was bored, but because I have to help Phil search for games and stuff for Spooky Week. I was secretly hoping for a FNAF 5, but I was disappointed. It's really hard to search for good games. Should I continue with Outlast? Maybe. But that game scares the Holy Jesus out of me.

Suddenly, the sofa started to vibrate so violently, I jumped out my sofa crease.
"HOLY MOTHER OF RECTANGLES," I screamed. I looked beside me. It was just Phil's phone, put on vibrate.
"Jesus, Phil, your phone can cause a magnitude 9 earthquake."
Phil didn't respond.
"Phil."
No answer. He was sitting right next to me, watching TV a little too intently. I'm surprised he couldn't feel the vibration, or that I just called upon the holy mother of rectangles in his ear.
"Phil."
No response.
"PHIL!"
Silence.
"PHILLIP LESTER FOR GOD'S SAKE PICK UP YOUR FUCKING PHONE!"
This time, he heard me, and he was surprised.
"Stop shouting!" he said, while picking up his phone. I just stared at him, dumbfound by that comment.

He started talking with,"Hey! Long time no talk! How are you?"
Who was he talking to? Whenever I ask him who it is, he responds with "the friend", as if I was supposed to know who "that friend" is. If he gives the same response today, I will fucking tear off his hand and hit him on the face with them while he hangs upside down from the ceiling fan.
"Wait what...I don't know...alright fine...bye!"
"Phil."
"Yeah?"
"Who was that?"
"Oh, it was that friend."
I had to try so hard not to do what I just described above, even though it was very tempting.
"Will you please kindly elaborate?" I asked him.
"What? I thought you already knew," he answered.
"Well, I clearly don't"
Phil sighed. "I'll tell you later. I need to watch this episode now."
I got annoyed. I picked up the remote and switched it off.
"Hey! That was an important episode!"
"Well, then, you should have told me about this a long time ago."
"Look, I thought you already knew! And anyway, it's not such a big deal. He's just a childhood friend."
"Oh," I said. I felt stupid for making a big scene.
"And by the way," he said, "he'll be coming to our house tomorrow."
"To visit you?"
"No...to stay here for a couple of weeks."