Chapter 18

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“So cry if you need to, but I can’t stay you watch you

That’s the wrong thing to do

Touch if you need to, but I can’t stay to hold you

That’s the wrong thing to do

Talk if you need to, but I can’t stay to hear you

That’s the wrong thing to do

Because you’ll say you love me, and I’ll end up lying

And say I love you, too”

Chapter 18

I woke up feeling..... Empty.

And using that description was for lack of a better world. Matt was all I had, and making the final decision to leave him was rash, I know but it was all I could do right now.

So I was isolated now, all I had was Cole, the worst part of it all was that I knew that I didn’t want to be with him anymore, even though I loved him, he was my first, he had made me fall for him and when I did there was no returning for me, I had know that but still I had taken the risk, I never thought though that I would ended up here, isolated. Losing two best friends and the person you once were was somewhat dramatic yes, but I was coping, I made it this far and there is no way in hell that I'm going to back down now.

I got out of bed to do my usual routine of getting ready, paying little attention to what I was doing; I pulled on the same regular jeans and top, with converse and put my hair into a messy bun.

I ran downstairs, just in time to get an energy bar before Cole honked.

I ran down to his car, noticing that he had a small smile on his face, which meant he was in a good mood. I sent out a silent prayer of thanks, because I didn’t know if I could have managed another attack from him today, if it were verbal or physical.

‘’Hey’’   I said as cheerily as I could, whilst getting into the front seat of his car.

“Hey baby.”  He said instantly, pulling my face in his hands and giving me a long lingering kiss.

His kisses did not have that much affect on me, yeah sure they left me breathless and gave me tingles but that was all. My heart didn’t ache to be close to him, like it once did. The flame we had was slowly fizzling.

“How did you sleep?” He asked sweetly.

“Good thank you.” I lied, “and you?”

“Great. So I was with Teagan this morning, you know I got her ready for school and had a chat with her.” Cole said excitedly.

He loved his little sister Teagan very much, she always put him in a better mood then I ever could, she was truly his little princess. And with that, Teagan and I got on great, she thought of me as her older sister, and I played the role quite well, I really adored her. When the three of us were together we all seemed lighter, like we had a lot of fun.

“What did she have to say for herself?”I asked.

“The usual, as you know she’s turning five next week and keeps asking me if you’re coming. You are going to come right?” he asked uncertainly.

“I wouldn’t miss it for the world.”I replied honestly.

“So, she was saying that you should stay the weekend and have like a sleep over party like the last time.”

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