Find my Way to You

Don't Go Yet

"What do you mean she's gone?" Ross asked pacing back and forth. The rest of the group just stared at the ground.

"WILL SOMEONE ANSWER ME?" Ross stopped and yelled towards everyone.

"She's gone, Ross..." Monica said slowly trying to keep her composure. "You're never going to see her again.. or any of us really.."

"How could she do this to me? I mean first she's out there kissing me and begging me to stay and then she leaves without saying goodbye?"

Ross couldn't believe that she wouldn't even say goodbye to any of them.

"Isn't this what you wanted?!" Monica said getting upset "You did pick Emily, remember?"

Ross just sighed and sat down. "Yes.. but I didn't want too." He said barely above a whisper.

"Whoa whoa wait." phoebe interrupted. "you guys kissed?"

"Well kind of, I mean she kissed me and I just pushed her off.."

Phoebe gasped, "never in my life would I see that coming. Ross Geller rejecting Rachel Green."

At that moment he knew he needed to say Goodbye. How could he handle never seeing her again and that being their last conversation.

"Where did she go?" Ross asked

"She asked me never to tell you, Ross." Monica said shaking her head.

"Ross ran over to Monica and grabbed her by the shoulders. "Mon, please. I need to see her." Ross began to get teary eyed.

"No, Ross. You've hurt her enough, let her get over you."

"Dammit, Mon please! I need to see her. I need to.." Ross began to cry and Monica sighed finally giving in.

"She's at the airport, and leaving for L.A."

Ross instantly kissed Monica on the cheek and headed out the door. He had to get there in time. He had to have his goodbye and he needed to spend the rest of the week with her. As he was driving he remembered all their times together and he knew he would miss her but.. he was married and needed to do everything he had to to fix it.

Ross finally arrived at the airport and ran around looking for her. He finally saw her standing in line and ran over to her and surprised her by picking her up in a hug and spinning them in a circle.

Rachel let out a squel and had no idea who it was until he put her down and she saw his face.

"Remind me to kill Monica." Rachel said angrily and pushed away from Ross.

"Rach.." Ross whispered in a desperate attempt and reached out for her.

"Don't call me Rach, it's Rachel to you okay?" She said in the bitchiest way and turned around.

"Why are you acting like this?"

"Because you are a fucking jerk!" Rachel screamed and the whole room turned to look at her. "I can't believe I was ever in love with you."

"That's a shame because I loved you a whole damn lot." Ross said raising his voice.

"Oh so that's why you're doing this to me? Oh yeah okay that makes sense now." she said sarcastically trying to move up in line.

"Rachel, stop! I came here for a reason!" Ross grabbed her arm and spun her around. "I came here to ask you not to go."

Rachel suddenly had hope in her eyes. He was going to tell her that he loved her and to stay with him she just knew it.

"Can't you atleast stay 2 more days before Emily comes?"

And then her world crashed. She lost the hope.

"please." he begged again.

Rachel really didn't want to stay but how could she say no to him? And what if he falls in love with her again?

"Fine." she finally gave in. Ross was so happy that he went to kiss her and realized what he was doing and hugged her instead.

"I love you." Rachel whimpered against his chest.

"What?" Ross asked not understanding her

"nothing.." she replied.

On the cab ride home they sat a good distance apart but Rachel slowly crept closer and closer until she was right beside him. She had to be pushy she thought. What's the worst that could happen.

Suddenly she rolled ontop of Ross's lap and kissed him. She could tell he was shocked and he tried to pull away but she wasn't going to let that happen. She forced her tongue inside his mouth and deepened the kiss, tangling her fingers in his hair. Rachel had a dress on and instinctively Ross' hands slid up both sides of her thighs and rested on her hips. Then he realized what was happening and threw her off of him onto the seat beside him.

"Enough Rachel!" he screamed putting his face in his hands.

"Dont tell me, you didn't enjoy that!" Rachel screamed sitting back up.

"I love Emily and I'm not going to cheat on her, I already made that mistake."

"It won't be a mistake with me..." Rachel said upset and faced towards the window.

She finally turned to look at him again. "Don't you miss any of that, Ross? I mean.. Kissing me and and holding me, and being yours?"

"Look, if you keep surprising me like that I'm afraid that I'll.."

"afraid that you'll what?" Rachel said getting close again.

"afraid that I'll fall in love with you again." he said turning away from her

"oh.." was all she could muster up. She didn't know if that was a good thing or bad. "But we could be together again! I mean it was perfect. And I love you so much, and-"

"Look Rachel! It's not going to happen! I love Emily more than I loved you, so drop it." He said angry and Rachel silently began to cry to herself. Ross didn't mean it.

He loved Rachel more. He always had. He lied to just make her stop because he knew if she kept it up he would give in and ruin is marriage again and Emily didn't deserve that.

Rachel felt like she had been shot and couldn't hold it in anymore. She started sobbing right before Ross. She had to get away from him.

"stop the cab!" she yelled and he immediately hit the brakes as Rachel opened her door. It was dark out and snowing but she didn't care at this point.

"Rach, where are you going?!" Ross screamed getting out also.

She didn't answer and just kept running. Ross then got back into the cab and went to his apartment.

He got there and immediately called Monica's.

"Yes, is Rachel there?"

"No? Why would she?" Monica asked and Ross hung up to go find her. She couldn't last out there for long it was freezing out.

He searched everywhere and was just about to give up when he finally saw her laying in the snow under a tree in the park. He ran up to her and began to shake her.

"Rach? Rachel?" he said but she was unconscious. "Baby, wake up." her lips were blue and her skin was freezing cold so he picked her up and brought her back to his place.

He wrapped her up in several blankets and layed down with her on the couch by the fire. She had to be okay. She just had to.