I Never Want to Lose My Best Friend

Blood For Blood, Hearts Beating

*a couple days later*


I've still been staying at the hospital with Vic, keeping an eye on him. Some of the nurses tried to get me to leave by luckily since Vic and I share the last name I've convinced them I was related, so they let me stay. The guys have been here a few times to say hi and see how things are going, but they've been busy trying to find a singer to cover for Vic on their tour that was coming up very soon. They would have normally canceled it, but seeing as how more than half the shows have already sold out, they decided to get someone to cover for him till he gets better. I would have offered to cover for him, if i didn't feel worthless and no where near worthy enough to take his place.

My thoughts were soon interrupted by someone coming into the room. Vic was having an exam done in another room, so i was by myself.

Kellin walked in along with Tony, Jaime, and Mike. Tony came over to the bed side where i was sitting and sat down next to me, wrapping his arm around my shoulders. I felt nothing. Not excited, or bubbly like i normally did around him. This concerned me and i knew i had to tell him. I looked down trying to avoid his face, but instead my attention was brought over to Jaime. He winked at me. I knew exactly what he meant by it. I smiled widely at him, then waved to Kellin and Mike.

"So what's up guys?" I asked anxiously. They looked down at the ground, or somewhere else in the room, trying to avoiding my gaze. I got the hint that they hadn't found anyone to sing.

"Great..." I mumbled.

"Well i guess i'll do it then." Everyones attention went straight to me. They all seemed either perplexed, or shocked. Only Jaime knew i could sing since he over heard me in the shower one day when i thought all the guys were out. Kellin spoke up,

"You can sing Kasandra?"

"Well, yeah. Im no where near worthy enough to sing as a replacement for Vic, but i will just have to, so his fans can be happy and enjoy at least those few hours at the concerts, cause i know how much his fans mean to him." I managed to choke out.

They all slowly nodded their heads in agreement. Ok, i thought to myself. While i still have a little bit of courage left i might as well tell Tone the bad news... I whispered in his ear,

"Tony, can i please talk to you out side, alone? I need to tell you something..." He nodded and i lead him outside the room, then walked down into a secluded exit way just down the hall.

"Look, Tone i... I don't know how to say this but...-"

"Your breaking up with me aren't you?" He asked sadly.

"Yeah... I'm really sorry Tony, but... I had a dream about Jaime... Then we kissed and i just feel this connection-"

"Wait, your leaving me for Jaime? We haven't even kissed and your already going after one of my best friends?!"

"No! Tony! It's not like that i-"

"Ok. Then what is it exactly?" He said harshly. I know this has to hurt him too... But... It's just not meant to be...

I didn't say anything, just kept my head down. I glanced back up at him. Finally, i pressed my lips to his. He cupped my face with his hand kissing me back tenderly. Nothing sparked. Now i KNOW I'm suppose to be with Jaime. I pulled away from the kiss as i hear someone say,

"What the... No. No no no..." I turned around to see Jaime dashing back down the hall towards the main exit. My heart twinged with pain. If only he knew i had chosen him over Tony. That i wanted him. Him and him only. I had ruined something else that would have been great in my life. I always manage to fuck everything up.

I chased after Jaime. I busted through the exit doors and looked out into the parking lot. I couldn't find him. I fell to my knees feeling useless like normal...the tears that formed in my eyes earlier, were now flowing freely from my eyes. I slowly pulled myself together long enough to find my car and get in the back seat. I curled up and balled my eyes out, just wishing i could start over from the beginning.