*
today is gonna be the day that they're gonna throw it back to you
by now you should've somehow realised what you've gotta do
I don't believe that anybody feels the way I do about you know
-oasis
*
I'm home for about an hour before my therapist texts me and tell me to meet her after school for a session. I told her I could meet her there now, so I got changed out of my school uniform and headed out.
It was a small five minute walk to where I had therapy. I went there twice a week or sometimes three; depending how I'm feeling. But most weeks it's only two. Jenny, my therapist, was very kind and she was a good listener and someone who I could talk to and trust. Even though that was her job, but she was pretty much my only friend.
I get there and Jenny is standing outside, waiting for me. She greets me with a hug and takes me around the back of the building; somewhere I had never been before. A long path led to a very green garden. I gasped. It was truly beautiful.
"Alexia. Sit down," She was sitting on a small rusty bench.
"How are you, Jenny?" I ask while sitting down.
She laughed. "I'm well. Yourself?"
I shrugged my shoulders. She raised her eyebrows. She knew something was up.
"Well, you know this Luke guy I talk about?" She nods. "Well, I've told you he always pushes me around and calls me stuff. Well actually his friends do. Anyway, today he actually started to talk to me. But as I was leaving school because I felt sick; which I didn't, anyway. When I was leaving he sort of came up to me. Oh my god. I'm such an idiot," I hit my forehead with my palm. "I kinda snapped."
"What did you say to him? How did it affect him?" Jenny asked.
"Well, at first I was delighted that he was talking to me, but then I asked him why he was talking to me. After a year, he decides to compliment my guitar skills. A whole year of being shoved down by this boy I've loved and then he decides to be all friendly, and pretends nothing ever happened?!" I sighed, almost in tears. "I didn't see how he reacted. I left the school before I could see. But, ugh I'm so stupid!! I shouldn't've said anything at all. He's probably really hurt about it."
Jenny made me calm down and we talked things out. We thought of plans to use and then our session was over. Which meant school was over too. I got out of the beautiful calming garden and started walking back to my house, unfortunately a few houses down I got hit by someone running ahead of me and I fell over, onto the cold concrete.
"Oh my god, are you okay?" I sit up and see Luke's shinning blue eyes fall onto mine.
"Oh yeah, don't worry about Luke," I half said half mumbled.
"You sure?" He said rubbing my arm. I looked at it and he quickly took his hand away. "Uh, sorry."
"Thank you," I said.
"For what?" He asked.
"You know Luke? I know you've only been at our school, for like a year. But before that. Three whole years and I've never gotten a simple sorry from anyone," I nod awkwardly to myself and walk to my house. Luke was left standing there, his mouth ajar open.
I didn't want to talk to Luke. Well I did, but I've been crazy in love with him for a few months now. And he treated me like shit, but them think it's alright to start talking to me and pretend nothing ever happened. You can't just do that.
I got inside and curled up in my blanket that lay on top of my bed. I wish I had a happy life, with my parents back and sister instead of my aunt that came around once a week to see how I was doing.
I had to do all of my shopping, cooking, washing, everything by myself. My head was hurting and I needed some food so I went to the grocery.
I got there and grabbed a trolley and went through the shop isles. I also liked living by myself, I had no one to worry about. All I had to do was get through every day by myself. Nothing like what it used to be: yelling, fighting, hitting. My parents did love each other. They loved me and my sister too. But they got in a horrible car crash with a massive truck, my mum died at the scene. My dad held on for two dragging days, but them we had to let go, he couldn't get through it-
"Alexia?" A hand waved in front of my face. "You okay?"
It was Luke, talking to me, again.
"Oh, uh. Yeah, I'm great," I could feel myself crying. "Wait? You work here?"
He blushed and looked at the ground. The tall boy was in the uniform for working here. How did he make everything look so good?
"Yeah, I need money, so I came here because it's close to where we, uh, I live."
I nod. "Okay."
"What are you doing here?" He asks, rubbing his neck.
"Uh, well I've gotta go shopping for myself."
"You've got heaps of stuff, wouldn't your mum do some of the shopping for you?" I was shocked. At school I was known as the freak whose parents died and sister was suicidal. But this was before Luke came to our school.
I felt a tear fall down my cheek. I shake my head at him, trying to hold in the tears. I walk off quickly. I didn't want Luke to see me cry. I looked at my phone and I had work. That's the problem without having parents, they left me their money, but I still have to have a job.
I take my shopping back home and get changed into my yoga pants and sweatshirt.
Yep, my job was being a yoga instructor at the local gym, where my mum worked. I was pretty much taking on her job for her. It reminded me of her a lot sometimes. She would always teach me yoga and now I'm replacing her, but I always calmed myself down doing the yoga.
-
My shift was over and I got payed, because today was my pay day. I always felt really relaxed after work. It wasn't a really stressful job, I'm surprised they left me work, considering I was so young. But me and my sister would always go with Mum. She's probably the main reason I have the job. They knew I was capable of doing it. It also helped with my therapy.
I almost ran into Luke on the way home. He was walking into his house, his work clothes still on. It was very dark in our street. We had minimal street lights, but just enough light for me to see where I was going. I got inside and locked all the doors and windows and had a shower before heading to my room to do some home work.
I got distracted from my homework, I had too many thoughts on my mind. I walked over to the window that showed a perfect view of the street. I lived in a pretty big house. We usually rented it out to large amounts of people while we went on holiday to somewhere. My thoughts soon got distracted by a figure, a tall figure. I thought Luke at first, but Luke was a bit taller and had straight blonde hair in a quiff. This, slightly shorter boy had curly brown hair.
He had stopped in front of my house, as there was a streetlight there, and he sat down on the curb. I knew I shouldn't have, but I went outside to see who he was. I don't think I've ever seen this boy in my neighbour before.
He heard the front door of my house close and he looked around to see me. He looked worried and turned his head back around and stood up to walk off. I ran after him. He put his hood up and hands in his pockets. I ran up to him and grabbed his arm, making him stop.
"What do you want?" He snapped. He had been crying.
"I want to know what's wrong," I said letting go of his arm.
He nodded. "You wouldn't want to, it's a long story anyway."
I nodded. "Okay. I'm Alexia."
"Ashton," He said putting his hand out for me to shake it.
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