i know how it is
that darkness
the darkness
oh how it clogs your mind
twisting and turning
infiltrating even the deepest
corners of your brain
i know how the darkness works
it affects vision
and hearing
someone says something
but you hear something else
and you keep it to yourself
your vision
a rock suddenly becomes
something you could bash
your head on
a pencil sharpener
and screwdriver
a weapon
to make ribbons of skin
that kitchen knife
a tool
to unleash rivers of blood
the balcony
a convenient place to jump off
i know how it is
i used to go out to watch the sunset
and end up looking at the ground
i used to go to cut an apple
but think about my neck
i used to keep a screwdriver
in my backpack
to feel that
if i needed it
i could borrow a pencil sharpener
and then
you realize that you're just
chopping up an apple
and then
you realize that you returned
that screwdriver
to the garage
and then
you realize that you're admiring
the sunset
and not the ground
and then
you look back
and you're not in the present
you're looking at the past
and maybe for now
your mind is still on ribbons of skin
and gallons of blood
and maybe for now
your thoughts are tainted
but
they clear up
maybe some parts
the darkness stays
but it goes back
it retreats
and it gets better
i love you day.
-em
YOU ARE READING
thoughts
Poetry"i'm forced to deal with what I feel, there is no distraction to mask what is real" -tøp just me
