How can you see into my eyes like open doors?
Leading you down into my core where I've become so numb,
Without a soul, my spirit sleeping somewhere cold,
Until you find it there and lead it back home,
BRING ME TO LIFE – EVANESCENCE
Blaise
"Don't..." I said as loudly as my voice could go.
Smitty Ray stopped, our eyes locked. Then mine traveled down his body, to his bloody knuckles.
"Blaise..." I squeezed my eyes shut against the way he sounds. He sounds as if it's killing him seeing me here.
"Blaise please?" I shook my head at him, watched as his eyes tear up, hands shaking at his sides then turning to fists.
I turned away from him even though I needed him here. I needed him.
"Blaise... I'm sorry." he whispered. A rustle of clothes and he was gone.
Dr. Li came in after and sat with me for a while.
"I want a protection order." I tell him.
"Okay. I'll let your mother's attorneys sort that out. You'll be coming home with me until you're okay on your own." I nodded and closed my eyes drifting off to sleep.
I went home with Dr. Li and stayed with him and his wife for a couple of weeks until I could move properly and all my bruises almost faded entirely.
I've been back home a few days now. Smitty Ray comes around and knocks. He knocks for hours sometimes but I can't let him in. Not again.
He texts me all day asking how I'm doing, if I ate, if I showered. He tells me about his day but I don't reply. I can't. Not anymore.
It's my mom's cremation today. I'm standing there in the funeral home's chapel and I can't bring myself to cry. Not anymore because I'm happy. I'm happy she's free.
"Fly blackbird." I whispered placing the last kiss I'll ever give her to her forehead.
Fly my little black bird.
I smiled at the memory.
I pass Smitty Ray and Bobby Ray, Theron, all the people who came to pay their respects.
My chest so full I feel as if I'll burst; just combust with nothing lingering; no remnants that I was ever here, that I ever lived.
All the memories pressing behind my eyes forcing me away, outside until I'm running; running with no destination in mind.
YOU ARE READING
Pride - The Jones Twins (LGBT//manxman) // #Wattys2016
RomanceTheron Being an almost eighteen year old dad is hard. Responsibilities are piled sky high and the odds of me being a good dad like mine was to me is quite bleak. But the smile on my baby's face makes me think I'm doing alright. But along came Bobby...