Scarred

Give Me Love

Chapter 11 Give me love 

Nathan’s pov

Life is remarkable thing it’s strong yet so fragile just like the persons who live it. Some get the wonderfulest gift that one can ever receive and that is a long joyful life, that doesn’t necessarily mean that all you’ll ever feel is happiness more like you’ll have some heartbreaks but then find love because after all that what’s life’s about, find that light who often come in persons, someone who brings you joy and makes you feel like you're the only one who matters. But there’s also those who never get to experience things like love and happiness, persons whom never get to see nor experience all those beautiful things. It’s funny how there’s people who have done nothing wrong in life or how children die when they’re the most innocent creatures alive. I mean how come they die and people who find joy in hurting others get to live. Let’s face it life is one of the unfairest things in this world.  

I lived a short life or compared to some a long life but yet I don’t find any consolation in that. I as the rest of mankind is greedy always wanting more rather than to actually look at all the things we have. I would lie if I said that I lived a happy life, more than once I lost faith in everything that’s possible to lose faith in. So many times I’ve doubted that there’s a god at all, I’ve had to feel pain not just the physical but also psychical pain. It’s hurts a lot more to see the ones you love crumble because of yourself and it pains you a lot more when there’s absolutely nothing you can do about it. I’d choose the pain and sickness any day instead of seeing my own family cry over me.

The worst part of it all isn’t that though it’s when you see your family starting to fall out, putting distance between them and building walls as high as the Empire State instead of growing a stronger bond they completely lost it. My family were once really close but my sickness destroyed it all. It was all my fault that they fell out.

It all started when I turned 9 before then I was the happiest boy alive. I had a family who loved me which I loved deeply in return especially, Ava my little sister. I wasn’t any different from all the other children I was young, energetic and carefree as child should be but as I turned 9 I no longer had that energetic side I easily got tired and I frequently started to get bruises which was quite strange since I never had the strenght to actually play or do anything really.

You have probably guessed by now what sort of illness I had. If you haven’t it was Leukemia that ended my life. But I must have gotten lucky because I lived many years longer than any doctor predicted. They said that I had the strongest willpower they’d ever seen. But everything comes to end mine came a bit faster than others but at least I found out what’s worth living for. I won’t say that I died happily because I didn’t but I did die peacefully and that I’ve come to value,I mean I didn’t have to suffer and I had the fortune to see my baby sister grow up and that’s all I ever could have asked for. I was lucky to at least see her turn 16. I got to see her learn to tie her shoes and I was there when she learned how to read but I also got to see her fall in love for the first time.

I died 1946 at the age of 18 in my bed while I were sleeping I were far too young but still it happened. I never got to experience things like love nor did I get the chance to travel the world due to my condition. Let’s just say that there’s a lot of things I never got to do which sucks.

Dying wasn’t painful or scary maybe because I was prepared or the fact that I had already lived much longer than I was supposed to. It was actually quite strange standing there looking at your own unliving body. It was even stranger when my mom walked right through me. If my illness hadn’t ripped my family completely apart then my death did. They cried and cried as if they would never smile again and the worst thing ever is to see people you love crying and not be able to do anything about it.