Girlfriend

23. Macy's

After the therapy session, I didn't feel like going anywhere so I called Michael instead of going to his house. He tried to give me some encouraging words but they didn't make me feel any better. We ended up talking about his little dancing party and my ballet recital that he told me he would go to. I don't even want to go to my recital and I'm in it.

We agreed to go dancing this weekend to celebrate both of our birthdays since they're so close. I loved the idea of dancing the night away with him. I could already feel his arms around me and his lips on mine again. He's so beautiful.

The next day while Mom's at work, I take about fifty dollars out of her little savings jar and go to Macy's to find an outfit. It's not like it was wrong to take the money. I'll just think of it as an early birthday present.

"Fancy meeting you here."

I turn and see David casually going through women's dresses like it's a normality. I scanned my surroundings before answering him. Is this a joke?

"What do you want?"

"Why do I always have to want something from you?"

I rolled my eyes and took a shimmery gold jumpsuit off the rack. That might blind Michael when we start dancing under all those lights. I put it back.

"Seriously, David, if you don't have anything to say, leave," I said, playing with the ruffles of a pink dress. Too frilly.

I felt arms curl around my waist and no matter how hard I tried to fight them, they don't go away.

"Get off me," I growled, digging my nails into his skin.

"I'm sorry for offending you, Cathy Jean," he purred into my ear. "I didn't mean to."

"I'm not buying this apology," I retorted, rolling my eyes.

"Why not?" He buries his face in the crook of my neck.

"Get off me right now."

"Why?"

"Because I said so. That should be enough," I snapped attempting to shake out of his arms.

"I love you."

"Shut the hell up," I cried.

"Shh!"

"Boy, don't shush me! You're the one trying to rape me in the middle of the store!"

"Be quiet! Oh my god, I just want to give you a hug." He presses his lips against my neck and I step on his foot so fast.

"Are you serious?!"

"Jesus Christ that hurt!" he hisses, holding onto the rack for support.

"You think? Get away from me. You keep screwing up and then asking why I don't want to talk to you. I don't want you at all, David. Take a hint."

I shoved past him and basically ran toward the exit. Unfortunately, David sprinted and clamped onto my wrist before my fingers touched the door.

"Don't run from me," he begged pulling me into his chest. "Talk to me for one second, please?"

"No! I will scream in three seconds if you don't let me go."

"Cathy Jean-"

"One!"

"Seriously, I just want to talk to you!"

"Two!"

"Don't scream!"

"Three!"

He smashed his lips against mine and held me close to him with no intention of letting me go. I didn't kiss him back at all. I swore I threw up a little in my mouth.

"David, stop," I breathed when I finally managed to break the kiss.

He didn't listen to me. Instead, he went back to manhandling my mouth and grabbing at my body like he owned me. I tried to push against his chest but he just did something to distract me so he didn't lose control over me.

"I love you," he whispered in between kisses. "I really do and I'm so sorry."

Why doesn't anyone else notice this? They can't tell that he's forcing himself on me?

I don't want this. I don't want this.

No matter how hard I try to get him off me it doesn't work. Tears began to brim in my eyes as I reluctantly give in. Maybe if I act like I like I'm enjoying this he'll stop.

I pretend I'm kissing Michael and things get more enjoyable. David laughed against my lips and finally let me go as I had hoped. He stroked my cheek and pecked my lips one last time.

"See, that wasn't so bad," he said, lacing his fingers with mine.

"I guess."

I looked down at the glossy floor and felt something uncomfortable form on my lips. My eyes widened when I saw my reflection in the floor. I just gave myself away to David.

I smiled for him. That was supposed to be Michael's smile and I wasted it on some guy that was about to rape me in a Macy's. What would I tell Michael this weekend? He can't know.

And that's why it would remain a secret.

A/N: I felt that in my heart oh my god. I hate myself for writing that lol. More soon after I pull myself together.