Everything That Could Have Been

The Last Author's Notes

thank you so much for reading my first story, hope it wasn't that bad. 

i wrote from 2 different perspectives, at the start, Audrey was a nice person, she was polite, she was friendly. But she was naive, and she trusted people to easily, but Kaelan didn't see any of her flaws, he loved her so much, he loved everything about her, but he let his fear get to him, and then it was too late. many of can empathize with Kaelan, liking someone and not having the guts to talk to them and then he or she ends up dating someone else. Kaelan is negative, he demoralizes himself and he thinks he is trash, when really he is not. I have friends who are so too, they hate themselves. We might meet someone like Saffron in our life, someone we desperately want to help but don't know how, sometimes we can't and we hate ourselves for it. She can't help but blame everything on herself, Kaelan mentioned she was a nice person but was probably afraid someone exploited that nice side of hers so she kept it inside. Hurt can do that to people, we become afraid of doing something and hence stop doing it. We know Saffron shouldn't blame herself for it but there are times where we do that too, we blame ourselves for something which really isn't out fault, just that we didn't see that or we didn't believe it. We know her relatives shouldn't be hostile towards her, there will be people who are desperately trying to recover, to heal but the people around them, the people around them just end up tearing open their wounds again. 

Sometimes things don't happen to way we thought it would, Kaelan thought he and Audrey will be friends forever, he was a kid, he was naive and innocent, which is just how kids are. He had high expectations but when Audrey couldn't remember who he was, his expecations were shattered and he ends up hurt. I have friends who said "dedrick is a douche", i actually wanted to write a 3rd perspective from his point of view but deleted it last minute. There are people like Dedrick, and the thing is, no one thinks he is wrong, in fact they glorify it, his friends saying he's cool. In life, sometimes it happens, an unhealthy behavior is passed off as "cool" or "okay" but it really isn't. We might have met people like Cheyenne who would lie and backstab her best friend. We won't see it coming and because we placed them so high, when they fall, your heart shatters. 

This story is very angsty, but thank you for reading it. Here are some fun facts. 

- i thought of this story on 1st of nov, on the day i went out w my friends

-i thought of the ending first, the part audrey and kaelan meet

-THIS WHOLE STORY IS ACTUALLY A PART SONG FIC BASED OFF THE AMAZING SONG "THERAPY" BY ALL TIME LOW.

-the  lyric which really got to me was "in a city of fools i was careful and cool but they tore me apart like a hurricane". at the start, kaelan made fun of his school mates, saying they were idiots, he thought he knew better, he was alone, he didn't need anyone but turns out on halloween he found out how great life was with a friend, and he couldn't go back to being alone. 

THANK YOU I LOVE YOU ALL