What were we built for, could someone tell me please?

17 y/o

"Don't turn around yet."

Ray was living with us now.

Eventually, things became normal and more natural. Ray and I usually shared my bed, fulfilling our needs for affection. Honestly, he was a cuddly guy. The second I'd get into bed with him, he would curl up against me one way or another. Holding my hands to warm them up- somehow his hands were always warm.

We basically switched between joking around, watching movies in silence and having deep conversations. The latter part mostly happened late at night. Well, early in the morning. We talked a lot about how he felt, like sexuality and gender identity. He was getting more and more at ease while talking about those things- not only with me. He told me he'd like to experiment, for both topics. Which was exactly what we were about to do.

"Can I turn around yet?" I whined, sitting on my bed with my hands covering my eyes. All I could hear was Ray stumbling around and sometimes fabric on fabric. Was he rearranging my closet or something?

"Not yet," he grumbled, the mattress dipping under- supposedly- his weight. I heard some more shuffling around, then felt him standing up and taking a deep breath.

"Go ahead."

I pulled my hands away and blinked quickly at the sudden bright light, then when I thought I could actually see again, I turned to face him.

My jaw dropped.

"Holy shit," I whispered, unable to look away. Ray was standing there with his hands behind his back, but he was wearing a skirt and stockings. I didn't know this was what he meant with experimenting.

"Myeah," he mumbled, blushing a bit. "It feels nice. Like, really loose 'n all? I like it."

I got up and walked over to him, running a hand down the side of the skirt gently. "Fuck, Ray- you look awfully cute in that," I laughed, shaking my head. He grinned sheepishly and rolled his eyes, shifting.

"I- thank you," he muttered, playing with the hem of his skirt.

"I didn't know you meant this when you said experimenting," I said. Well, not like I minded. I knew he'd been doing different stuff to find things out- some of them not as much fun as the others.

A while ago we started going to clubs or events from time to time. Usually Ray hooked up with someone, whether it was some flirting, kissing, or... more. He'd had boys and girls- which wasn't hard. Literally everyone could fall for him. He was hot, friendly, funny- what else do you need, right?

At least, /I/ didn't need much else.

I was really really glad that he finally got the courage to discover himself, without feeling bad for it. Yet whenever he hooked up with someone, I felt- strange. I suddenly didn't like the idea of it anymore. I'd rather have him at home, in his nerdy pajamas, cuddling with me. I know it sounds selfish, but every time I see him with somebody else, I get so... Angry, on the inside.

I felt like I wanted Ray all for myself.

"Gee? Are you listening?" He asked, waving a hand in front of my face. I looked up quickly, eyes wide. "Huh? Sorry, sorry-" I mumbled, blushing a bit. "You, uh, you look really good."

"Thanks," he laughed, looking away. I glanced up at him- had he been this close the whole time?

He glanced down at me- he was /tall/. Like, I had to tilt my head up to look at him. I could only think of how sweet, how beautiful he was, how soft his lips seemed-

He suddenly leaned down and pressed them against mine.

I froze, my eyes wide open. So /that/'s what they felt like. I soon enough kissed him back, eyes falling shut, my hands on his cheeks. I suddenly felt calm and satisfied- this is the thing I didn't know I needed.

He pulled away after a while- too soon for my liking. I needed more. I immediately pulled him back down, pressing our lips together again. He didn't complain, he kissed back right away, which I could only take as a good sign.

Eventually we parted again, both blushing and panting softly. I looked down, my hand finding his. Ray let out a soft laugh, tangling our fingers together. "Been wanting to do that for quite a while," he whispered. It made me giggle.

"I'm glad," I said, looking up at him. "Like, I really am." I was.

He chuckled and suddenly hugged me tightly, burying his face in my neck. "Love you," he whispered, kissing my shoulder. I giggled and wrapped my arms around him, stroking his hair. "Love you too," I whispered back, pressing a kiss to his forehead.

"Cuddle and movies?" I asked. He giggled and nodded, taking my hands and pulling me to the bed. He was surprisingly comfortable already.

We didn't take long to curl up against each other, snuggled underneath the covers. I had his arms around him, lightly stroking his hair as I watched the movie. Ray slowly tangled our legs, taking my free hand and intertwining our fingers. He occasionally pressed small kisses to my chin or cheek, and sometimes I tilted my head down to meet his lips.

I could definitely get used to this.

_