drawn - h.s.

v.

[ellie’s pov]

I was lying on my back in the soft summer green grass and watched how the treetops were softly dancing with the wind. You couldn’t feel the summerbreeze down here in the hide between the tall trees, but yet single sunbeams had managed to find their way down through the crowns to here.

It was not really a meadow, and not really a normal part of the small forest. And it wasn’t really a forest - for that it was too small. But it did however give you a feeling of being all alone in the world, if you lay here. In the grass and watched the swaying tree tops, while birds twittered around you and honey bees flew lazily from flower to flower.

I tried forgetting about him - but I just couldn’t. Simply. After that dinner I had gone to my room with the intention of throwing out the picture of Harry. But I hadn’t. I hadn’t been able to do it. In the night I had had a nightmare which I desperately had tried forgetting all week. But now it was Thursday and tomorrow the school would be over for this year - and that picture of him was still safely hidden in my wooden chest in my room in the attic.

Don’t think about him. Don’t. Don’t Don’t. Don’t. The command echoed through my mind as if it had been waves in a heavy storm on the open ocean. I tried drowning him. The thought of him. But he just kept on floating to the surface, surviving and somehow my mental picture of him only grew clearer, and clearer each time.

“Ellie are you okay?” My mum had asked more often than she usually did this past week. I had been too occupied in my try to not think about him, to remember to act normal. For all in the world I tried to not think about drawing him. What wouldn’t happen if I did so? I had my fears.

As the green color of the tree tops started forming to his jade green eyes, I sighed heavily and got up on my elbows annoyed that Harry now even was to find in my secret little place in the middle of the forest. Which wasn’t really a real forest.

There was no one here. I let my eyes turn to the little very unusual and seemingly out of place flower bed which seemed to have chosen to grow almost randomly right here in my secret place in the not-really-a-forest forest. It was not an usual kind of flower bed - for that it was way too colorful for the English wildflowers, which usually grew around here. And the flowers were all different - nothing like any flower you would see anywhere else. Only one place else of course though.

I watched the newest addition to the collection, which had started growing a week ago and was now finally in blossom. It had that familiar especially tangled petal pattern, which was formed like black ink lines on the lavender colored heart shaped petals. The stem had small thorns so it could protect itself. Just like I had given it a week ago.

Lazily, as a sun beam kissed the skin on my already sun blushed cheeks I let my finger run over the soft petal, following the line I had made before. A sad feeling growing in my chest. Drawn. What would happen if I ended up drawing him? What would happen? I had no idea about this gift of mine - how to control it. How it worked. All I knew was that everyone thought I was absolutely crazy. Sometimes I even wondered about it myself - whether I was crazy or not. If this was merely my imagination or fantasy. Or if it was in fact reality. I wasn’t sure what I hoped it to be honestly.

But the touch of the petal felt so real against my fingertips.

What would happen if I drew him? Would I be able to feel his soft skin against my fingertips too? What if -

I was interrupted as I heard that faint call through the trees. It was my mum. Telling me dinner was ready probably. I got up from the ground - red marks after the grass I had been laying on were visible on my skin, as I brushed off the dirt.

As I walked home the sun slowly moved further and further down the sky.

“Honey could you grab the salad? From the kitchen counter?” Were my mum’s first words as I entered the small kitchen through the kitchen door. She was always so busy making everything cozy and perfect, with her dotted oven mitts and a steamy dish in her hands. I grabbed a pencil from the counter and quickly fastened my blonde hair in a bun with it - not even thinking about doing it really - before grabbing that damn green salad and following her into the front garden.

In the sweet scent of summer flowers out in the garden, sat my father and grandfather already deep into a conversation about whatever - it could be everything was Picasso's blue art period to why a cloud was called a cloud. I loved listening to the two of them - though I hated it when they tried dragging me into the actual conversation. The best thing would be when I could hear their talk through my open window in the attic, while drawing. Occasionally I would start chuckling so much over their odd way of thinking, so they would stop talking - as they could hear my giggles coming through the window.

“So Ellie - did you think about your granddad’s suggestion from last weekend?” My dad asked with a crooked smile as he passed around the plates after placing a mouth watering piece of lasagne on each.

“Yeah,” I tried spiking one of the peas with my fork, as mum broke in - “I think it’s a terrific idea! I’m sure there’ll be several young interesting people for you to talk with honey! And you can start saving up for your art studies!”

Finally I got the little pea stabbed and I propped it into my mouth quietly, as I watched how my father sent my mother those ‘let-her-talk-for-herself’ eyes. And she responded with a silent  ‘oh-you’re-always-making-a-fuss-about-everything-I-do’ gaze back at him.

Meanwhile I had weighed out my options. Honestly I hadn’t paid much attention last time grandpa was here - and I hadn’t really heard what his suggestion was. My mind too clouded with someone else. But I guess it was a good idea when thinking about saving up. And I loved the place; how it always smelled like popcorns. The mere thought of the place had me smiling already.

As my father was responding my mum in their silent talk, I interrupted them - surprising everyone it seemed, as they almost stared at me.

“Yeah - actually I think it’s a great idea. For me to come work there. I mean. And meeting…” I tried smiling, but failed miserably, “people.” I gulped that last sentence down with a piece of lasagna. With each passing second I regretted what I had just said. Though my mum was already clapping her hands and my dad sending me a warm smile. Grandpa just laughed his deep rumbling comforting laughter - it seemed to me he was the only one not thinking of me as crazy.

“Great then - you can start trying it out as a summer job. If you still like it at the end of the vacation it’s yours to keep sweet Ellie.” Jack - my grandpa - watched me with his sweet caring brown eyes, that resembled my father’s so much. As he leaned in and whispered the words, while my parents were arguing over whatever they had managed to work up an argue about. I sent him a genuine smile and nodded - still slightly nervous though. I hoped this summer was going to be okay after all.

Hopefully it could take my mind off Harry at least.

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a/n: hope you liked this :) ! x