My First Crush

Chapter 21: TRUST

Cece´s POV

“Are we going to go and get lunch?” Evan suddenly asked and I shrugged. “You are a difficult thing to deal with, you know that don´t you?” he let a frustrated growl.

“Well that´s exactly why you don´t need too.” I bitterly answer.

“No luck in getting rid of me Cece. Anyway who were those guys?”

“Just classmates.”

“I hate them.”

“Why? They are so charming…”

“I will get something to eat, you are going to come with me.” he asked persuasive.

“No.”

“Oh darling it was not a question- I am not eating alone.” he smirked and stated.

*

*

“Want a drive back home?” Eric asked me when I went out the classroom.

“No.” I ignore him.

“Too bad because you are getting one- we are going to hang out like we used to.”

“Fuck off. What sick game are you playing? I already told you…”

“That we aren´t friends anymore, I know you are stuck to believe that.” he mumbled.

“I´m walking to my house- you are not coming with me.” I told him and rolled my eyes showing no interest.

“Are you being like that because of the gossips?” he suddenly spit out.

“I don´t know what you are talking about.” I lied.

“Well great you didn´t heard rumors about how we had sex?”

“That´s not true.”

“I know, you know, so can we cut the crap and go for an ice-cream?”

“What? No!” I walked away.

“Oh so this is now how it is? You are all okay with Evan but forget about me…”

“What does Evan have to do in all this?”

“I saw you at lunch with him- just like the first day of school, Jason was not happy.”

“Well.I.don´t.care”

“He knows nothing about anything, today he interrogate me about what happened on the party.”

“What?”

“What you´ve heard, he started asking what happened that night, and in the morning…”

“What did you tell him?”

“What had happened.”

“But nothing happened!”

“That´s right, so can you please now stop pushing me away?”

“I will do when you stop talking to me.”

“That has no sense Cece!” he shouted but I was already half a block away from him.

*

I arrived at my pretty lonely house as I thought of the tedious days ahead. There was nothing that I carved to do, nothing that would make my time worth, I was sick of the pointless life I was carrying. I was sick of my lack of feelings, of hunger, of tiredness- but that same lack was the one consuming me.

My body was nothing; it was too heavy to stand still yet too weightless to want to make an effort to move, the ambiguity was killing me. Suddenly Evan pop into my head- and how foolish had I been in giving him trust, allowing myself to have hope. That same confusion made me lost balance as I went up the stairs, so my exhausted body let the strength go, crashing hardly to the floor. My head crashed with it badly, and I could feel the extreme pain in that spot of my forehead right before my hair started. Anyways, I passed by the pain to lay calmly torpid on the floor as tears ran slowly free down my cheek.