DISTRACTED

SS: Mistakes

This following short story is considered triggering, depressing (to some people, everyone has an opinion)
If you are easily triggered, please don't read. Don't say I didn't warn you. I am here if you need someone, okay? I know what you are thinking that I see that good in everything, but no...I know what you are going through cause I have been going through the same for the past year and a half.
I'm here for you.
Read at your own risk.

BASED ON A TRUE STORY

I get escorted into the office and I drop my backpack before pulling out a notebook. I quickly write an entry, my words blurred from the tears that gathered in my eyes.
"Stephanie, can you come in my office?" My school counselor asked.
I stood up and took my stuff with me. I sat down as she closed the door, the tears falling at a regular rate. Both the principal and the counselor were there.
Shit.
I looked down at my notebook before blinking, my throat thick.
"What exactly happened back there, Stephanie?" Mr. Salisbury asks.
I blink, not saying a word.
"Stephanie, what you did back there was unacceptable." He spoke.
My shoulders began to shake.
He let out a sigh, the sound of papers echoing in the room.
"Stephanie, I would expell you right now, but knowing we are only two months into the school year, I am just going to suspended you for three days."
I gulp, my breaths turning into ragged gasps as more tears fall. I open my notebook and blink through the tears, writing down the first words.
Dear everyone.
"I hope you understand what you did, and please don't do it again." He says.
He stands up and leaves the room. Despite Mrs. Roscoe still being here, I let my tears go.
My gasps rang through the room, tears falling faster. I sucked in breaths, trying to stop my crying.
"So...do...you want to leave the office, or...?"
I shook my head. "N-No. I d-dont want to show m-my face to a-a-anyone."
She nods. "I understand."
I look back down at the paper and write who the letter was going to. After a minute, the bell rang and I threw my backpack on, running outside to the buses. I paused by a tree before realizing Roscoe followed me.
"Is your bus here?" She asked.
I watched as a kid paused by me. "My bus is fucking coming!" I snapped.
The kid took a few steps back, and I looked away, up at the tree.
I should be hanging off that tree...
The bus pulls up, and I climb inside, going all the way to the back.
I look down and write the rest of the letter, more tears falling.
The words 'kill yourself' sang to me, and I was falling in their trap.
I looked outside and climbed off the bus, walking up to my home. I took out my headphones and played the song, my favorite one, knowing this might be the last time I hear it.
As I enter my home, I go to my room before the rushing to the bathroom. I turn on the water to the shower, stripping before stepping in.
The warm water spread down my back, but I lifted my arm. I flipped the blade and pressed the tip to my wrist before digging inside and ripping it through, blood dropping to the ground.
I did this several more times, the pain calming me down slightly as I took deep breaths.
I climbed out of the shower 30 minutes later, and put clothes back on. I went upstairs, grabbing the first pill bottle I saw, dumping them into my hand. I rushed downstairs and put my notebook on the ground besides me, opening it to my suicide note.
I take my jacket off and open the water bottle, drinking.
One pill...Two pills...Three pills...Four...
About 40 pills later, my vision was blurry and my mouth tasted like the medication.
I took a deep breath, muttering my friends' names under my breath before closing my eyes. I titled my head back to take another pill, but I fell, loosing all energy as my eyes stayed closed and I lost myself to the darkness.
It's over... it's finally down.

Dear... everyone.
SM, AP, HS, CG, TL, AM, EC...
Hey guys. I was with you on the Color Run in today. We were running, laughing, enjoying ourselves. I was with my love...I was...I love you guys. You guys make my day. And I forgot to bring a second shirt today. So Abby followed me and I took off my coat.
Everybody fucking stared. I'm sorry.
So here I am, in the office, crying, and making this letter. Please remember me.
Thomas, Hayden, Jazzy, Abby, thanks for making me laugh everyday. I fucking love you guys, you guys are awesome.
But I can't take this humiliation. Thanks for staying with me-not making me alone. I love you guys.
So here are my last words to you guys.
My last words are going to be your names, because there is nothing better that I've seen or felt. (lol, made it sound wrong on purpose)
I love you guys, Kay?
Abby keep the shirt for me.
Have fun in your days as if you Neve noticed me. Well... remember me, but please don't be sad. Please don't grieve for me.  I don't deserve it. I don't deserve anything.
I'm planning to never talk again. Ever. I'm suspended for three days...
Bye guys. XOXO
Signing out, forever.
P.S: Buy the everything sandwich. For me?

•••••
The letter on the end is her suicide note.
Yes, this is based on a true story. Suicide note is real, attempt is real, people are real. The girl is still alive today, I can promise you that. Her attempt did not work.
I'm sorry if this was very depressing, I...this memory has haunted me for a while now and...yeah...I...decided to write about it.
For both of us, the girl and I.
Thank you for reading my little angels and demons!