Mine

Chapter 30

"Dad you have to go to your appointment!" I said dragging him by his arm out of his room.

"No!" He shouted rooting himself to the ground. It's like this every week, going on for about a month.

"Alex! Help me!" I yelled trying to drag him out of the room. "Dad they are helping you!" I exclaim, blowing a chocolate curl out of my face.

"No they aren't! They ask the same questions and then shove pills -that don't work- down my throat!" He yelled wiggling in my grip.

"Dad you are going whether you like it or not!" I said as Alex and Jared ran in, grabbing him by his arms and legs and lifting him up as he squirmed.

"Put me down! Alex I've wiped your ass when you were a child! Now put me down!" Dad exclaimed squirming as they carried him to the truck.

"You'll be fine dad." Alex said as I followed behind them. Dylan was sat in his car seat, buckled and everything. I climbed in the driver's seat, waiting for Alex and Jared to sit on either sides if dad, and hold him down, trapped in the seat. Last time he sat without being strapped in, he jumped out. I was going 50mph and he opened the door and jumped out.

•

"And when we get home, you can go back to bed. Okay dad?" I ask peering over him as I sped off to his psychologist appointment.

"Dad what the hell are you doing?!" I asked reaching my hand over, and grabbing his shirt as he opened the door. I started slowing down as he jumped out, his shirt slipping from my grasp. My heart dropped, as I slowed down, swerving off the road, and getting out the car. I ran to him grabbing my phone and dialing Alex number. Dad lied in a ball sobbing rocking himself.

"I don't wanna live. I don't wanna live." He sobbed as I kept the phone to my face waiting for Alex to answer.

•

The car ride was full of his cries as he lashed against the boys.

"Here." I said pulling into the parking lot. I parked my truck, as Alex and Jared carried out dad, while I got Dylan. They carried him to his room while I signed him in, Dylan, hugging my thighs.

"Ahh, good evening Max." The receptionist flirted, resting his chin on his palm as he stared me down. His browns eyes caught mine as he gave me a flirty smile.

"Good evening." I replied dropping the pen and walking to a chair, and sitting. Dylan played with the toys as thoughts ran through my mind.

Blake hasn't talked to me since Christmas- well he's texted but, I'm not going to text someone with the situation I've been sandwiched in. But god have I missed him. Sleeping is basically impossible, not only can I not sleep with out the comfort of Blake, but dad wakes up from night terrors. He screams every night, sobbing, and the minute I'm there, waking him up, he looks at me with a blank stare, before falling back asleep. Thankfully, Jared goes over to Blake's weekly to check up on him. He brings me a sweater of his, telling me to try and get some sleep, and I do... for about an hour. I have bags under my eyes, and my hair feels dull, less bounce. I feel dead. Seeing my dad stare at me blankly, seeing him continuously try to end his life, seeing him scream and cry every day, it's drained me. Alex and Jared try to get me to sleep at night, but they don't hear his screams. They've blocked him out, but I haven't. It's an everyday thing for a month. I have to shove his pills and food down his throat now, he never takes anything willingly.

I sighed rubbing my eyes as I watched Dylan play with the toys some more.

Jared and Alex have to keep him down while he's in the psychologist room, and he doesn't even speak, he just says he wants to be dead. They want to take him to a mental hospital, where they can keep their eyes on him at all times, and lately I've been contemplating the idea.