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Cry Baby

This is going to be about my anxiety, so maybe some of you will find some hope in this.

Anxiety is a mental condition, this does not mean I'm crazy. It simply means that some parts of my brain doesn't work like most people. This is also what causes me to have ADHD, signals in my brain are different or don't get transferred properly. So, in a way, it's all in my head. (Please bear in mind that this is a pun.)

Anxiety generally has two forms, anxiety attacks and blow-everything-out-of-proportion. I am very lucky and have the second type. I say I'm lucky because I had to do research on anxiety attacks and they pretty much suck. I've heard then be compared to heat attacks, but correct me if I'm wrong. My heart goes out to anyone who gets those.

I tend to think worse case scenario, it's just an instant reaction. When I'm put in a situation that causes me to become anxious, I can almost become animalistic. I go to my most basic state for protection.

I'm a very stubborn person by nature. I come from a long line of women who don't take anyone's crap.

Another thing about me, I am somewhat of a cry baby. I'm an emotional person. Emotional responses are fairly tricky as they can't always be shut off on command. I have to be able to cry it out. Am I proud of it? Not really, but it's how I'm wired.

One last thing, I'm not normal and I will never be normal. Is it hard to accept that? Yes, but it's the hand I've been dealt. My brain doesn't work normally and, while medicine helps, it will always be a part of who I am. You can't out grow anxiety or ADHD, and no matter what some people think, they are real.

This is me.