As I hold the spoon to the flame,
As I stick the needle in my skin,
I can feel it now...literally coursing through my veins making sure every part of me is numb,
Making sure every part of me is lifted..
I can even feel my soul beginning too fade away, and every negative trace of me is being taken out of my body...this feeling is so blissful
But it goes away..leaving me
Crying on the outside and dying on the inside.
Don't look at me!
Don't touch me!
Who Am I !
What's wrong with me !!
Go away..please please go away go away go away go away please just go away
But it stays..and I want more, I need more to get away from myself I don't care I just want to go.
Be so faded that I don't care who I am and I can feel that amazing feeling again erasing my emotions like I never had them
One day...I wake up in the hospital
I was force to accept reality for what it was
But even if they are right...I can feel it every part of my body feels like it's dying , my body struggled to the point where I can't stay still
I just want that feeling again and again
