Black Temptation

Chapter 38

His car smacks against the wall. Flips over. Flips over. Flips over. The hoof is gone. The trunk is gone. The windows are broken. The car is smoking. People are screaming. Rescuers are running. I'm running. I'm running on the track. My hat falls. I throw my shows. Barley is behind me. I reach the car. They are pulling him out. He's not moving. They pump him with oxygen. I push past idle rescuers. I see his blood stained face.

"Oh-h God..."

And Harley grabs me as I fall to my knees. I rip off him. I run to Harry and stroke his hair lightly. His eyes are squinted. He starts breathing. His knee looks disconnected. But he's breathing. Then why the fuck do I feel like part of me is dead? I try to stop the years from falling on his face. I grab my stomach in pure agony. They reach in his car and take out an inhaler. They shake their heads like it's empty. I'm confused. His golden falls aside, releasing that Holden cross. It feels like it falls in slow motion as do everything. The impact noise it creates sounds like an atomic bomb. I struggle to pick it up. They yell,

"He's losing consciousness again!"

And they put him in the ambulance and when I jump inside, they pull me out.

"No! Let go! I have to be with him!"

"Ma'am! We have to get him to the hospital and it's already too crowded. BACK UP!"

Harley pulls me away, kicking and screaming as the tears leave stains only cheeks. I grab his blazer and shove my head into its seams as the ambulance drives into the distance.s

"HARRY!"

"McKenzie! Stop!"

"HARRY!" I'm screaming like he can hear me. Harley tried to restrain me as Marcella and Macklemore stand to the right, shocked, dazed and on the verge of breaking.

"HARRY! NO NO MY BABY!!" Loosing balance, once again I fall to my knees in great defeat. Harley tries to pick me up but has to hell me up because I'm weak and my legs are no support for this heavy heart.

And as we stand there, drowned in confusion, I can only think of the little infinity we had together.

***

I'm pacing the halls barefoot, biting my nails. Mack goes to get some coffee for all of us. But I'm stone. I can't even reach for it when he tried to hand it to me. Running my head, I don't even understand time anymore. Time is a slut and it screwed me good. It screwed all off us. 5:00. 5:00 am. He's been in the ER for 13 hours. Workers won't let in the building so they camp out for the time being. I, myself, do not feel weight of exhaustion on these bones. Frankly, I can't feel them. But who cares?

This is my 338th pacer. They all try to talk to me but it falls on deaf ears. I don't answer. I don't need to. Looking down the hallway, I see Dr. Wolfe running towards us.

"McKenzie...."

Don't. Don't. Just please don't give me any bad news. I start shaking my head as Harley goes to hold my hand.

"I'm so sorry."

My vision is blurry. The world seems to stop spinning but now it's me who's revolving. I'm dizzy. I'm nauseous.

"I'm going to throw up." I cry.

He's not dead! He's not dead! He can't be! I can just hear him saying, "Harry Styles doesn't die." I start to kick everything. The walls. The plants. the chairs. Myself.

"FUCCCK!" I screams. I punch the walls, I break the flower cases. I begin to throw the shards at people. At the door. At myself. I cut my hand, again and again. I wipe the blood one my white drees. It seeps into the dress but burns my fingers. I start running, screaming, unable to be caught until I run into a wall, falling on my head in a blackout.