I Need You (Daryl Dixon Fanfiction)

Chapter 15

Rue-

"Guys this is Hershel Jr." Maggie said softly, holding a bundle of rolls wrapped in a blanket. I sat on the bed next to her, Daryl sitting on the other side of her, looking at the small baby, he looked like he had just stopped crying.

"Maggie, he's so cute." I oohed and awed over him.

"You wanna?" She gestured the baby toward me.

"No, someone else should hold him first." I quickly stood up from the bed. Rick was the first to hold little Hershel.

I didn't know Maggie's husband Glenn, but from what everyone told me, he was a very caring, unselfish man. They told me a lot about Glenn, I would've loved to have met him. Little Hershel was passed around, and Daryl was the last to hold him, and everyone had cleared out of the room. It was just Daryl, Maggie, the baby, and I. Daryl's eyes started to fill with tears, as he cradled the baby in his arms, he sniffed, and wiped his eyes. There was something about this whole situation that had Daryl upset, I knew how Glenn died, but I never got the details of the story.

"Daryl, it's okay." Maggie spoke softly blinking back tears. He sniffed again, nodding his head sadly.

I didn't want to interrupt whatever moment they were having, so I sat silently, holding in my emotion, being strong. Daryl sat down next to Maggie, still holding little Hershel, bringing a hand to his eyes, as he cried more. Maggie wrapped her arm around his shoulders comforting him, I continued to stand back, I obviously didn't know the whole situation. He sniffed again, handing little Hershel back to Maggie," do you want to hold him now?" Maggie asked with a sweet smile on her face.

"No it's okay, I'll hold him another time." I smiled back," c'mon Daryl, lets go home." I put my hand on his shoulder and led him out the door.

"Ruth, wait, can I talk to you real quick?" Maggie called me back," close the door." I closed the door and she patted the bed, and I came over sitting next to her." I think you should know what's going on, because I don't think Daryl will tell you."

"Okay." I looked at her curiously and ready to listen.

"The night Glenn died, Daryl blames himself for it, Negan was taunting us, and Daryl had enough of it and attacked him, and because of that Negan killed my husband. I don't think it was Daryl's fault, I feel like Negan would've killed another one of us either way, that just encouraged him to do it." Maggie spoke with strength in her voice. I was silent for a long time." I just wanted you to know that, okay?" She nodded at me. I nodded back hugging her, then gently patted little Hershel's head before leaving.

We arrived back home, and Daryl grabbed my hand leading me back to our house." What's going on?" I said closing the door.

"Glenn dying, that was my fault." He said gruffly.

"Maggie told me," he looked at me," it wasn't your fault Daryl, everything I've heard and seen, he would've done it even if you would've just sat there." He clenched his eyes shut, and dropped his head onto my shoulder, crying. I grabbed the back of his neck, and rubbed his arm." It's okay." I sniffed, blinking away my tears, I needed to stay strong. He then took several deep breaths and wiped his eyes using the back of his hand.

I hugged him again, tightly," it's okay." I whispered, I kissed him on the cheek, then pulled away," are you okay now?" I asked trying to find his eyes. He nodded, I pushed his hair back out of his face," are you sure?" I looked at his bright blue eyes, and he made eye contact with me this time.

"Yeah." He grumbled.

"Okay, good." I smiled. I went into the bathroom, and pulled off my shirt, and unbuttoned my pants, exposing my scars. They were pretty ugly, since the doctor Carson had to get bullets out of me, and repair my rib. Looking at these scars everyday just made me mad, made me feel stupid for what I did. I failed to avoid people, and I got shot in the process, not just once, but twice.

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The day was coming to an end, I was sitting on my bed, looking through the scrap notes my family had written. Then memories started coming back to me, when I was dying and I saw my family, but my dad wasn't there. Could he have survived, but how, and where was he? When I went back for his backpack, it was covered in blood, and torn to pieces, but there was no remnants of a body anywhere, I realized.

I shook my head pushing the memories from my mind. I pulled out my torn clothes, and grabbed my needle and thread and started to repair my clothes. First my olive jacket with the antlers, it had a bullet hole through it, and torn elbows, I patched it then moved on to a pair of jeans, patching them up. I sewed a couple other holes in other things I owned until coming across my dad's Punisher shirt that I never sewed for him. I skimmed over all the holes, there was one just below the collar, a few scattered holes on the shoulder, probably from getting caught on tree branches, and a few more on the back and side. Then there was the bullet holes, one right next to the symbol on the shirt and the other a few inches above the hem. After looking over the shirt for several minutes I decided to leave the holes.

There was a light knock on my door," come in." I spoke loud enough to be heard, and in stepped Daryl." Hey, you okay?" I said looking him over.

He was dirty, his hands were black, mucky, and blood splattered up his arms, on his face, his clothes got the worst of it. He kept his gaze lowered as he stood in my door way." What happened?" I jumped up, looking him over.

"I didn't kill those men." He said darkly," I let them turn, I went back and found 'em, and killed them again." He looked at me now," I let you down." He said.

"Daryl, no-"

"I did, I let my guard down, those men shot you, you almost died!" He yelled." That was my fault!" He was pounding his hand against his chest.

"Daryl, that wasn't anyone's fault, I was the one that didn't drop my bow!" I yelled back.

"You know the first thing I thought when I was carrying you." He lowered his voice," it's happening again." His voice cracked." Every time I let anyone get close they die!" He threw his hands up in the air," Beth, and Carol, that was almost you!" He was very clearly upset.

"Daryl, look at me, I'm still alive!" I grabbed his arm." I'm still alive!" He hugged me tightly, pressing his cheek to the top of my head." I need you Daryl." He pulled away, and looked down at me.

"I need you too." He looked deep into my eyes.

"C'mon, let's get you cleaned up." I grabbed his hand and led him to the bathroom.

I wet a wash cloth and started to clean the blood off of his face. I knew he was capable of cleaning himself, but I mean he helped me a lot while I was recovering from my bullet wounds, so I wanted to help him. Using the rag I pushed his hair out of his face again, and gently started to wipe the blood from his face. I rinsed out the rag, took his shirt off, and started to clean his arms, that took longer. After he was cleaned up, I took him out to the living room, and took his boots off. I sat on the couch, and he laid his head on my lap. I ran my fingers through his greasy hair, pulling his hair back. He looked straight ahead at the wall, he had his hand placed on my leg, and his other hanging over the couch.

"You want to go to bed?" I spoke softly.

"Yeah." He said getting up.

"Do you wanna be alone?" I asked, kind of having a hard time reading him at this point.

"Maybe." He headed up the stairs. Well not sure what that meant. I mean it's been an emotional day for him, but I mean, sometimes being alone wasn't the best thing. I mean he told me he needed me, so should I go to his room?

I went upstairs, his door was closed, so I sat against the wall across from his door, and waited to see if anything would happen. To see if I could hear anything, see if he came out of his room, anything.

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Hey guys, so I know the dates leading up to Hershel Jr probably don't add up, but it was something I wanted to add, but it was something I wanted to make happen when Ruth and Daryl knew each other better. But I hope you liked it!