Feelings

(3)

Darry

"Pony?" It was 10:30 AM. Pony was usually up by now. He has never slept past ten.

"Pony?" I called out again at the closed door.

No answer.

I opened the door after knocking to find the room in shambles and no Pony.

Panic started to rise in me. Where was he?

I ran through all of the rooms waking up the sleeping bodies of the Gang, telling them that I couldn't find Pony. "He's just gone," I explained.

Everyone gathered in the living room, on edge, afraid that Pony was going to get hurt, too. Even Johnny was a little panicked. His best friend was out there alone with people who want to hurt him.

"Steve and Soda, you go look -"

''Bang.''

Ponyboy walked into the house as if nothing was happening. "Hey Guys. Are we having a house meeting?" He smirked as he sat down on the couch. There was something off about him. Usually when we worry, he would be whining about how sorry he was.

"Where have you been?"

"I don't know. Around." He put his hands behind his head. At the moment, he was starting to act like Dallas.

"PONYBOY CURTIS! YOU BETTER TELL ME WHERE THE HELL YOU WERE! WE'VE BEEN WORRIED SICK!" I couldn't control my anger. Pony was never one to give me half-assed answers. I tried controlling my feelings around Johnny. Out of the corner of my eye, I could see him shaking.

"I did tell you. I had things to do, people to see. I've been around." Pony was as calm as can be. He wasn't losing his tuffness.

I raked my finger through my hair, stressed. I didn't know what to do with him anymore. "I'm going to work. We'll discuss this later."

As I turned and started walking towards the door, I heard Ponyboy say, "First off, you don't have work because it's wet outside and two... what's there to discuss. From what I can see, we're done." That stopped me in my tracks and apparently it surprised everyone else as well. No one ever dared to talk back to me when I said something was going to be done. Not even Dally. They all thought that I was too brawl and tough to battle with.

"What did you say?" I turned my head to see Pony rising from his seat on the couch.

"You heard me. Man, I thought you were dumb, not deaf, too," Pony said as he took out a cancer stick and lit it.

That was it. I ran across the room to my kid brother and raised my hand to him.

He didn't even flinch. He just stood there, as calm as ever, puffing smoke out of his mouth. Even as I had the guys trying to pull me away from him, I could see that this wasn't the brother I knew. What had happened? I thought that we were so close but now . . . there's a giant wall separating us and I don't know if I can climb back over it.

***

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-DMBW