Feelings

(5)

Dallas

Weeks Later . . .

Pony was late. Again. He's been past his curfew by hours every night for the past few weeks. He is seriously pushing his limitations. Darry's been on his case ever since he came home acting cold-hearted and mean, a few weeks ago. Pony rarely shows his face at home and when he does, he looks tougher, colder, and meaner. He's not the same Ponyboy that we grew to know and love. No, something had hardened him. He's been this way ever since Johnny got beat up real bad by his bastard dad. Something must have happened.

Pony would only talk to Johnny without giving lip. Maybe Johnny can help bring Pony to his original self. From the look in everyone's eyes, I can tell that they miss the old him, too.

"Hey, Johnny."

"Yeah?" Johnny looked up the TV screen. Two-Bit's favorite show was on - Mickey Mouse. Two-Bit could watch Mickey all day long and wouldn't get sick of it. Mickey is like his cartoon hero, if that even makes sense.

"I was wondering if you'd talk to Pony for us. He just ain't himself anymore." By now, the Gang had tagged themselves in the conversation and was nodding their heads. They all agreed.

"Umm, sure. But, what am I supposed to say?"

"Say whatever you think is going to make him calm down and stop acting like Dallas. No offense to you, Dallas," Darry said.

"None taken. I also want that little pony to stop being a horse, especially since he's treating the rest of us like his horse shit. I swear, I'm almost close to knocking him in the head." I replied.

Even though I could see the Curtis's brotherly love kicking in and wanting to defend the little Curtis, they kept their mouths shut because they agreed with me.

Even Darry felt the need to hit his little Kid brother, but he doesn't and instead takes all of his anger out on his own body. He works twice as hard at work and he doesn't even need to. But, it's something to distract him from his home life. I'm not saying that he doesn't loves us like a family, but he doesn't like what Pony's attitude was doing to the family.

The first time, ever, that Pony talked with lip to Sodapop, Soda didn't know what to do. He had ran to his room, having Steve trail after him, and the eighteen year old Curtis cried on his friend's shoulder. Steve got mad at Pony for acting like a blockhead, and even yelled at him a few times for it.

Sometimes even Darry would complain to Soda about Pony. Two-Bit drank a lot more and wasn't home, But, at least he was home more that Pony. I, myself, told Darry a few times to get his little brother in check, but that was the closes thing that I ever came to complaining. I could tell that Johnny was a little hurt by the way Pony was treating everyone. He came here to get away from violence not to put himself deeper in that shit. The new Pony was affecting everyone.

"I'll talk to him when he gets home," Johnny said. While we waited, we watched Mickey Mouse. Pony was due to be home in a few hours.

But Pony never came home.

Not that day.

Not the next day.

Not even the day after that one.

He never even came home that entire week.

We searched for him, day after day. And, still we found no trace of the fifteen year old. Everyone was worse than the week that Pony and Johnny was in Windrixville after killing that Soc, a little more than a year ago. I think his name was Bob, or something. Yeah, that seems like the guy's name. I don't regret that Johnny killed that Soc. I actually should've celebrate the death of that clown. I wish that I was the one to kill that kid. I would have made it slow and painful instead of being nice like Johnny and giving that Soc a quick death.

Now that Pony is gone, everyone is a hot mess. Soda and Darry lock themselves in their room and when they do come out, they have dark circles under their eyes and look like zombies. They walk around, all cried out, hoping that their little brother will come home and they could finally be a family.

We all hoped that. I just can't stand to see all of these tears and emotions. It's seriously giving me a headache. These babies need to harden their hearts a little bit. But of course they would foolishly turn out like me and I wouldn't wish my life on anyone. I couldn't blame them for their feelings. I could say that I softened too, being in the house with the guys. And I could tell you for a fact that I don't like these feelings.

"Ring, Ring, Ring . . ." The shrill sound of the phone broke through the silence of the house - even though that the TV was on, it was on a low volume so that everyone could hear if Pony was coming up the stairs.

"Ring, Ring, Ring . . ." Darry ran to the noise, hoping that the call was from the youngest Curtis Gang member.

"Ring, Ring, -" Silence befell upon the house. Everyone was anticipating that it was Pony. Even me.

"Hello," Darry said in his grown-up like mature voice.

There was a distant voice on the other line and everyone watched as Darry's face turned whiter than a sheet of paper.

"What's wrong," Soda whispered, slowly bouncing up and down like a little child.

Darry just put a finger up while he said "Yes," and "Ok," to the person on the other line. He slowly returned close to his former color, but he still remained pale.

The twenty-two year old hung up the phone with a '''clack' ''and hung his head low with his hand still on the phone.

"Darry, what's going on?" Steve said. He was holding a shaking Soda. We feared the worst.

"We have to go to the hospital. Johnny's dad is there and Pony too. Let's go."

***

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-DMBW