esoteric ↯ dean winchester x reader

i.

Getting up from the couch of your empty apartment, you yawned to go find a snack for your 5 pm breakfast. You had a late night working the night before. And now your heat had also been turned off so you pulled the comforter from the bed and wrapped it around your body tight. You turned on your favorite music so loud until your neighbor pounded on the wall to shut up, so you turned it louder, he was an ass anyway.

Then you went to the bathroom to get ready for the night. When the steam heated up the air around you, you stripped of your PJs and comforter, seeing the side of yourself nobody else gets to see anymore. The no makeup, natural hair, sleepy-eyed, and vulnerable girl.

You stared at the mirror until it fogged up and forced you to move to the shower before it was time for work. You lived alone and preferred that. Being alone made things easier. You had no one else to rely on but yourself and the lack of outside aid is what made it so satisfying. You thrived off of being able to provide for yourself.

You blasted your music and danced in the shower, almost falling at one point. You stood in there bathing in the hot water for a second, debating on how tonight might end. If you would spend another night alone. As much as you take pride in your independence, at night when you lay in bed you wished someone were there to hold you. Sometimes you wished someone was there to talk to.

You didn't want sex as much as you wanted someone to talk to and care about but you don't mind settling in the slightest for now. That being said, you also knew you couldn't handle a relationship even if you really wanted to. And you wanted to. But sometimes that just wasn't an option, and you got lonely.

You traveled a lot. Every few months you'd ditch one town then hop to the next for work. Tonight you went to work at your part-time job. Nights you worked as a bartender, serving drinks to scumbags who leave lousy tips.

"(Y/N)! There you are, I thought you were going to be late again." Your boss, Gary, an older gentleman exclaimed, "We're packed again."

"Sorry, I'm here." You replied, smugly acting as though you had always been on time.

"Yeah, you and everyone else." He rolled his eyes, you were lucky, you're a drifter and had a job. Gary threw you the towel to wash up the bar, you just laughed.

"You love me." You smiled.

"Sure. And Black Sabbath is recording a bubblegum pop album." He shook his head, "You know what, no, you don't get off easy, I'll clean the bar. You clock in and handle the drunks."

"Fine." You threw him back the towel. You pushed the hair out of your face, sighing about the time you had spent on it.

  You went through your first table of guys having their bachelor party. They were all sloppy and two shots past their limit. One guy grabbed your ass, you yelped at the surprise then grabbed his wrist squeezing it so hard he let go, "Hands to ourselves, please."

You left the guys howling. Telling Gary you refused to serve them. That they needed to be cut off, and Gary agreed. You'd be flattered if you also didn't know that all guys, especially when drunk, would have sex with a jelly donut.

"How we doin' here? Anything else I can get you? Another round maybe?" You pulled out your pen and pad to serve to a man who sat at a table in the corner by himself. He had been here a few nights in a row. Never with anyone, sometimes with work sometimes not. At first, he didn't even look up, consumed in his work. He was working on something in a manilla folder. You knocked on the table, he jumped at the sound.

"Sorry, didn't mean to startle you." You smiled, "Just letting you know I'm taking over the shift for Gary. So, uh, if you need anything, I'm here."

"Thanks." He said. Shifting and staring at you up and down for a second. You nodded and began to leave.

"What's your.." his words fell off but it kept your attention.

"Sorry?" You turned around.

"What's your name? You know, in case I need you." He asked again. You were debating whether or not to be into him. He was easily the most attractive guy that had walked into the bar since you started working here, you've gone home with far less. You did have so much work to do when you got home.

"(Y/N)." You smiled. The moment you saw his smile you decided if he offered tonight, you would say yes. No guy ever wonders about your name.

"Dean." He nodded, offering his hand.

"Nice to meet you, Dean." You smiled and shook his hand.

"I have one more question before you go." He turned in his chair a little bit, calling after you. His green eyes illuminating when he made eye contact with you.

"I might have an answer." You smiled, staring at him.

"Did it hurt... when you fell from... heaven?" Dean rose an eyebrow to try and commit. He had a commitment to himself to never be the first to make the move, but he had seen you a few times and every time it drove him wild. There was something about you that just lit up a room. You could tell by his face he regretted saying the stupid line as soon as he said it. The man inside felt off his game and shaky and pretty dang drunk. He actually wiped his face of the cheesiness, keeping his hand over his mouth to hide his laugh at himself.

"No, but I did break a nail crawling out of Hell." You put away your pad and pen, a bit put off considering that was not the first time you had heard that from a guy in a bar, "Looks like you're pretty far gone. So let's stop the alcohol, and how about some food, hun. Coming right up."

Dean watched you walk away in amazement, you were exactly the woman he dreamed of.