Not Nearly Metta

Antonio

      “Antonio my water broke” Lela yelled from the bottom of the stairs. “Are you sure” I yelled out from the upstairs bed room. “Yes I can’t stop it” she said. I ran down the stairs skipping as many as I could. “Are you in any pain” I asked. “No! I thought I was peeing but I couldn’t stop it” she said. “Okay come on the bag is by the door and I’ll call the doctor and let him know we are on the way” I said grabbing her hand and then the bag. I could feel my heart beating so fast and so loud I was sure she could hear it. “Baby calm down” she said. “I am” I said looking her in the eyes while she grabbed my face. “Look I’ll call the doctor, can you please get some towels and clean up the mess I’ve done please” she said. She was surprising very calm and I guess I was over reacting so I calmed down. I guess her mother instincts kicked in and she knew exactly what to do. Momentarily I forgot all the lessons I learned from the baby classes. “We have plenty of time before the baby is ready to be delivered” she said picking up the phone to call the doctor. As I cleaned up the area where her water broke I saw that she was counting the time between her contractions.

     An hour later we walked into the hospital and even though she could walk just fine they made her sit down in a wheelchair. Twenty minutes later a nurse came in and asked Lela if she would like the epidural after she checked how much she dilated. “It is an injection of pain relief directly into the spine. It numbs your legs and lower torso but still enables you to push” she said. “No thank you we’re going to do this natural” I said. She nodded and left out. Two or three hours later Lela was not a happy camper at all.

     I tried to keep Lela calm but she was yelling at the nurse as if it was her fault. I should have let her get the epidural. I was so nervous for her I wish I could take her pain away. For a split moment I think I lost my mind because I could have sworn I seen her head turn all the way around and spoke in a voice that was not hers. “What do you think I’m doing holding my damn breath” Lela said it made me snap back to reality. She went back and forth yelling at the nurse and then me. To be honest it was giving me a head ach. “NOW THAT IS ENOUGH LELA. THE NURSE IS TRYING TO DO HER JOB SO SHUT UP AND DO WHAT SHE SAYS” I said. I know I was in the wrong because she was in pain and I’m the one to blame for it but I wanted her to just do what the nurse said so we can be done with this. The look on Lela face said that she was in disbelief of what I said. For a moment the nurse and Lela broke concentrating on the baby and just stared at me with a blank look. 

      Lela began to scream and the nurse ran out to get the doctor. “Lela, baby I am sorry for what I said” I said rubbing her head. “Give me your hand” she said very calm as I placed my hand in hers. She began to squeeze my hand tight I didn’t even know she had that much strength. I couldn’t even make a sound I just began to swivel down to my knees in pain. “Hurts doesn’t it, yea I know it does. Now multiply that by a thousand to the tenth power and apply that to you reproductive system. Now imagine the tip of your penis dilating 10 fucking centimeters while you big headed son is trying to come out but the nurse is telling you no don’t push yet. However, there is a shot you can have that will take away all that pain but I basically tell you don’t get it take it like a man. What is your reaction Antonio Treymain Artest? I bet you’ll be losing your fucking mind too right, so the next time you part your lips to say something to me think about what the hell I am going through” she said in a calm yet angry voice. She was right I didn’t really consider her feelings I just wanted her to shut up. When she was finally able to push I didn’t say anything else other than words of encouragement.

      Two hours later the nurse was placing my son in my hands. I could feel my pulse race as I stared into the eyes of my beautiful son. “Welcome to the word Isaiah it took you so long to get here but you were worth the wait. Are you ready to meet your beautiful mother? She’s a bit tired from being in labor for so long but I know she’s happy you’re finally here” I said placing the baby in her arms. “February 12th at 5:06 pm you gave me the second most beautiful gift other than your hand in marriage. You gave me 8 pounds, 5 oz, and 21 inches of perfection I love you so much Lela” I said looking down at her and the baby. “And I love you more Antonio” she said as I leaned down to kiss her and then the baby.

       The next day it was finally time for Lela to do her first feeding mother hood was a good look for her. She still had a glow as I looked her in the eyes she was so beautiful I couldn’t break eye contact. A sense of peace came over me as she turned her attention to the baby. She smiled down at him showing her pearly white teeth and dimples she was a mother and I was a father. “Marry me” I said. “What” she said with a confused look on her face “we are married silly. Maybe you need to rest did you get any sleep”. “Marry me again! I know you’re not in the condition to do it now and there would be a lot of planning to do but I want to be able to celebrate our union as one with our son. Maybe in 5 years” I said standing by her side. “I do” she said after a few moments.

         Later on that night we just stayed up talking and laughing like we did the very first day we met. “I can’t wait to get home tomorrow” she said. “I know so what do you plan on doing about work. You know you don’t have to work, you can stay home with Isaiah” I said. “I want to work. I didn’t go to school to be a stay at home wife” she said. “I understand that but you are a mother now” I said placing my hand on the baby back as she continued to breast feed him. “And you’re a father. He will need you just as much as he will need me. I don’t want you working all these hours and your son grows up without even knowing you. I love my job but I love our son more. I plan on taking a break for some time and gradually start working again” she said. “Well whatever you want I’m behind you 100% I don’t want you to over work yourself because I can take care of us all” I said. “I know baby and I love you so much and if I feel over worked I’ll stop ok” she said.