Told By Us (Completed)

Fears

September 8,2014

   Dear diary,
       I guess I'm in a writing mood. I can't tell anymore. This might be my last time writing in you. I lost my brother and now my mind is all over the place. It hurts so bad. But I haven't cried yet. A part of me doesn't feel like it's real. It doesn't want to believe that it's real. The funeral is Saturday and I can't even imagine seeing him anywhere, but home.

My mom claim to the police that she had no idea of his behavior outside of the house. That would be true considering she was never here. It made me want to hate her. I did hate her. She didn't ever come home. Maybe if she had Juna..... Juna would be here.

My dad told me that I was more then welcome to come and live with him. I accepted his offer without hesitation. I just wanted to get far away from her. She didn't fight him on it. She knew it was for the best. We all did.

  He set up a room for me.  It was small and nice. Anything was nice I guess. Ailani texted me the other day. I didn't even answer, because I didn't want to talk to her. I didn't even want to look at anybody. Mellow grabbed my homework, which I won't even do. My heart hurts. My mind throbs.

  Charlie tries to be there for me. But I'm just using him. I can't really bring myself to let him in. That's what I'll do. I'll just lock everybody out. To show them that I'm fine. That the one love that I had in my life is gone, will not show on my face, but on my sleeve.

                                              Goodbye diary
                                                                   Jamie