Criminal Minds: Gideon finds love

Capítulo 11- Gideon hurt Mia

At this moment in time, Gideon felt like his entire world was crashing down. In his mind, it really was. It was like he'd just been in a car crash that he'd never quite recover from; An event in his life that would change things forever. His past was a dark place; the amount of bad things that happened to him was almost impossible to count on one hand. Throughout all of it, the only light in his life was Mia. She has always been the something good amongst all the bad things, and now he'd ruined her too.At this point he was convinced that it was him; that he was the problem. He felt as if everything he touched turned bad-- like he was toxic. He was the husband of a woman that he'd always seen as the dearest woman who'd ever lived; and now she was broken.

Now he was broken.

Watching James try to take Mia away from him, had literally felt like his heart was being ripped out of his chest, but deep down he knew that Mia 'd chose. And she 'd choose Gideon.

He always thought that her help would be enough, but when he yelled at her and she saw a flash of something in his eyes that triggered fear-- fear of her own husband, that's when he knew. She wouldn't be of any help to him anymore. He was getting worse and worse and it was getting to the point where he was getting considering hurting people that he loves. She dind'r want to live in fear for someone that she loved so much; to have to deal with that awful terror and panic she 'd felt merely a few hours when he yell at her. It would slowly drive him insane-- not like he wasn't on the verge of it already.

By now Gideon was used to dealing with the brunt of bad things happening to him-- but this, this was different. This was Mia.

He quite literally felt like part of him had been ripped away, and that there was nothing to live for anymore. He 'd failed her, and now he care was out of his hands completely. Looking after Mia was all he'd ever known for a long time now. His family meant more to him than anything and he'd always put them before himself, but now he was in a position where he had no family to look after. Mia was gone, Stephen seemed to slowly be distancing himself and the only other member of his family that was still alive-- he wanted nowhere near her. He was put in a position where all he could do was work on dealing with himself and his own issues, to try and get himself to a happy place or a least one where he wasn't just siting at his kitchen table staring into space for hours on end. From the moment Gideon's SUV drove away, the minute he trudged back to his empty cabin and closed the door, that was all he could do. It was a cycle; he'd cry, then go silent for a while, then cry again and repeat. He couldn't take his mind anywhere else, and it was getting to the stage where he decided perhaps alcohol would help. He'd forget for a little while, at least, be able to twist off the lid of the bottle of Vodka, there was knock at the door.

He croaked, his voice effected greatly by the extent of his crying and shouting throughout the night.

He heard the knock again, but this time was louder. This was no time for visitors, he thought. But as the knocks just continued and became more and more rapid, Gideon simply had to get up and go over the door. He was already hearing voices in his head, and he didn't need some continuous annoying knocking accompanying it either. He walked over the door, peeking through the glass first to see who was there. Mia.

He concealed himself from view quickly, wiping his eyes and face in attempt to remove all evidence that he'd been crying as itensely as he had been. There was no hidind it though, obviously. His eyes were red and puffy and still glassy with tears, his hair unkempt. He looked exactly how he felt. Broken.

"Mia?" he began, trying to keep his voice stable and mask any emotion that might be present in his tone. "are you okay? I mean, did i hurt you back there..... do you forgive me?" He spoke quickly, a nervous and panicked ramble.

Mia Jacobs had bever been one to be so hounded by co-workers, yet alone other people in general. Despite the fact that her own job as a doctor brought her to conversing with so many she previously did or didn't know, it all still didn't mean she was favourable of the simple act of a small talk. It had been a few years now that Mia herself had been residing in Roanoke County, abd now, everything seemed to be falling into its rightful place.

It had been a long night, Currently, Mia had been sitting in her vehicle just outside of the Gideon's cabin. Mia, thanks to her treasured frind\ almost husband Jason Gideon, had come to learn more of his attitudes. She had heard briefly about it before from his former team of the BAU, about his past. Driving away took Mia only moments. No thought was put further into where she was going next. She knew Gideon, the love of her life, he was back at his cabin. Alone, Knowing him, and other in general, she knew that it wans't a good deed to leave an emotionally unstable person alone. Espeacially after what happen in the dinner with James drunk saying that he loves her and Gideon get lost and yell at her, like that was her fault, he'd get himself hurt. She put her car in front of the cabin and started to make her way to the door. she didn't stop herself from knocking right away on the door once she arrived. She clean her tears and Knocked three times. No answer. And again. No answer, Mia was about to get worried. Her knocking then intensified and she was about to ready to break down the door when Gideon had finally asnwered. And, her earlier thoughts about how he shouldn't be left alone soon became known to be true. It was completely apparent in the way that he noe looked.

"Shh shh shhh." She started, as Mia then brought a single hand up to make it known for he to be quiet. "Jason, i'm fine. I am. I just run away because i was afraid of you. you had never yelled me before, and i never saw those eyes mad, furious with me before, and that really scared me. Everything is okay." She took a pause on her words as Mia gave Gideon a simple look in the eyes. It was then that she could truly tell he was hurting. "have... have you been crying?" as much as she hated those worda and nearly felt uncomfortable saying them, it was about the only thing she could manage.

Oddly, Mia's words did manage to calm Gideon slightly. He didn't think that was at all possible for anyone to achieve right now, but she has just about managed it. In his mind, as long as Mia was safe and confortable, that was all that mattered. Sure she still longed for her to be back there, so she herself could be the judge of just now safe and confortable he was, but the simple knowledge that he was doing okay was good enough for now. Shoud he trust on Mia to tell the truth, he still wasn't sure. On numerous occasions now she'd assured him that he couls trust on her, but it just wasn't as easy as that. with her track record of putting his heart on the cases that he solve on the BAU, Gideon was a lot more wary now. However in a state such as this, in atime where he wasvulnerable, that wall just slipped away completely. He was willing to put his trust in her because he has to. He needed to.

She nooded, crossing her arms over his chest, both a nervous gesture triggered by her subconscious, and some attempt to protect herself from the bitter cold inside. She almost flinched as he asked if she'd been crying too, not expecting that he wanted to see her again.

Clearly, his attempt at masking how emotionally drained he was had failed miserably. Just because he could trust on Mia about his past, that didn't mean he wasn't still going to build his walls up. Eventually he'd have to learn to open himself up to other people, because he could hardly go on dealing with the demons in his mind alone for much longer, not if he wanted to stay sane that is. As of right now, he was just far too stubborn to let anyone knows about his past. To let anyone to see his break, to appear weak and vulnerable. so insted, he put up his wall, kept up his usual attitude that from experience usually succeeded in pushing people away, just what the stubborn part of his wanted. "i have been crying?" he scoffed. "well lets see shall we, my love had just been hurt by me, and i don't know if she will ever forgive me." The tone of his voice was small and flat, his eyes narrowed slightly in distaste towards her.

Mia approaching him and kiss him.

"does this answered to your question?" she said.

Gideon grab her from her waist and keep kissing her lips and lais her down on the couch, slowly, like she was a butterfly and he didn't want to hurt her more that he already did.