The Story of Me (gender bend)

happy new year...

Hey guys. HAPPY NEW YEAR AND HAPPY 2K17!!! I'm going to have to get use to writing that on my papers at school.

The last chapter I published was written a while ago and it was unfinished, but for some reason I decided to publish it.

Also, yes I realize that I didn't capitalize any letter at all in the chapter title and that's mainly because it's 12:16am and I should be going to bed because I have school tomorrow, but I couldn't sleep so here I am.

Just a little update on my life.

Up until a month ago I though I was just a little happy bisexual bean. I was dating the girl of my dreams. My grades were higher than they ever had been. I was making loads of friends everyday. And then I say down and really thought to myself "am I really happy?"

I ask myself these questions from time to time, usually at midnight, just to see how I'm doing and to be completely honest with myself and y'all, I felt like something was missing or like something just wasn't right. So I dug in some more and when I was tired of talking to my loser self, I started talking to my real friends and my girlfriend, Bunny. Then I just talked to Bunny, because she's one of the only people that I even felt like I could talk to in the middle of the night , sound like a complete idiot, and then still talk to her for the next day and still feel comfortable talking.

Can someone count how many times I typed "talk" please and then tell me?

Eventually I stopped talking to my lady and I started talking to myself again. And I found out something about myself. I'm afraid of long-term commitment.

I date girls and I do these things with them and when I feel like things are getting too serious I leave. I say something to them and to myself that will make both of us feel better about the break up, but it's really not any better and I felt like a horrible person.

So I started talking to myself again and the thought occurred to me, "what if I'm just not happy with women?"

Obviously I got to call up my dudes and talk this out, because I don't know what's going on. Eventually at 3am after talking to my boys, my girl, and me I came to the conclusion that I might be gay.

I wake up at 12 in the afternoon the next morning and I think about what I concluded and I confirmed to my well-rested self that it must be true.

I told my dad and my dad didn't tell my mom, thankfully, but he told my grandpa and my grandpa didn't seem all too happy about it, but I know he accepts and loves me still even if homosexuality isn't "in the bible, you know?"

I haven't told everyone yet, but I thought I might as well say it on here, mostly because a lot of my friends read this. Hey guys.

I broke up with Bunny, but she's still one of my best gal friends. Probably one of the closet. Although part of me wishes that I could have went into the New Year with her by my side, the other part of me knew that'd be selfish of me.

This probably doesn't make any sense,  considering that I didn't edit any of this and my story telling is bad, so here's the summary: I'm gay.

I hope you guys have a good 2K17. Fall in love. Meet new people. Find yourself.

It's now 12:50am and I have to wake up at 5am. Good night everyone....💋