Diary entry

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Dear Diary,

I wish my parents really cared enough about me to ask the occasional question,"How was school?"

But some people just get all the luck. I have an older brother who is so smart and he was so fun to be around. He was the one person who actually paid attention to me for reasons such as how funny I can be, how sweet I am, and how mischievous I act(in a good way). My parents have always loved him more than me, and it used to make me feel really sad about myself that I couldn't live up to their standards. When I was born, they wanted me to be a doctor, like my brother is. But we soon figured out that I have an irrational fear of medical stuff, like anatomy and stuff. They literally had to email my teachers to let them know that I can't be in the classroom when they teach this stuff because I am probably going to puke or something. I only had five years with my brother. and then he went to Harvard University. He is also a math prodigy.

I, on the other hand, am a struggling B student who is bad at almost every subject except art. But, I have found something about school that I liked; gossiping. My brother always told me that my personality attracted people like a magnet, and I used to laugh every time he told me that. But after getting into middle school, I realized that he was right, and I could feel people drawn to me when I walked into a room. Suddenly I was surrounded by people who wanted everything from me, whether it was hair style tips, or if they could sit with me at lunch. And just like that, I'm popular.

I feel like I have changed so much since my brother left. My mom and dad are always bragging about him going to Harvard and all that, but they never put in a single good word about me, even though I have many of my own achievements; Getting my art into lots of art shows(which they never go to), being asked to be on the cover of an American Girl magazine(which they declined), and passing with A grades this term. I know they are disappointed I am not going to be a doctor, but I wish they would show more support for me. Without them approving of me and my 'hobbies', all of my success feels empty.

And on top of all of this, my brother is getting married next month! I feel like after he moves in with a girl I barely know, he and I will barely see each other! He will be completely out of my life, and I might never connect with him the way I used to. Already, my parents don't like me, and now with my brother leaving, I literally don't know what to do!

At  my middle school, there is this super annoying girl called Camille. She is not exactly annoying, but she gets amazing grades, has real friends who love her regardless of the way she looks, and she is honest, kind, and has loving parents! It's not at all fair.

I know it was mean to trip her, and always say rude things to her, but I can't help myself. It is not fair that Camille gets everything I don't. And I don't want anyone's sympathy about my life, so I make it seem like it is so great; designer dresses, Christmas presents, etc. But in reality, my parents rarely buy me things, and my dress was just a regular dress on clearance. And when my parents found out I got suspended, they started yelling at me every day now. I cry every day into my pillow and my stuffed watermelon. And I don't know what to do, but Camille is going to pay for hurting my feelings!

-Ari

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