Relentless

Tony

You're so ugly

Don't wake up.

Everyone hates you.

Watch out, everyone is out to get you.

Don't do that.

You look stupid.

That is just a small portion of what the voices whisper to me everyday, but the voices are my friends. They help me in a way nobody else understands. That's why I'm being sent to the hospital, because nobody understands.

"Tony! Did you take your medicine?" My mom shouted from downstairs.

"No I'll do it now." I replied and went to the medicine cabinet in the bathroom.

No! Don't take that.

I kept my hand hovered over the lid of the bottle debating on taking my meds.

It's poison!

"But if I don't take it I'll get in trouble." I replied to the voices.

We'll go away forever if you take that.

The voices are my friends and why would my friends hurt me, I thought to myself. I decided to listen to the voices and place the bottle back in the cabinet.

Good job, Tony.

I smiled, its nice when the voices praise me. Normally they aren't so kind, but they are only mean to protect me. Sometimes they are a little too mean, they'll tell me vulgar things and make me feel bad about myself.

I went back to my bedroom to get some clothes and change. I looked in the mirror, expecting the voices to tell me how terrible I looked but they left me alone, to my surprise.

"Tony, breakfast is ready." I ran downstairs to see what my mom had cooked. She made my favorite, chocolate pancakes, eggs and freshly squeezed orange juice. I sat at the table and starting digging in.

Don't eat that. It'll make you fat!

I stared back down at the fattening food. "But it's my favorite." I thought and slowly began eating again.

"Tony? Hunny, what's wrong?" My mom asked. I shook my head and pushed the plate away.

"I'm not hungry." I muttered and got up to throw away my half eaten food.

My mom sighed, "Can you at least eat some fruit?" I thought about it for a moment, fruits are healthy therefore the voices will be happy with me. I nodded, causing her to smile softly. I grabbed an apple and sat back down at the table. I started to feel bad, my mother is such a loving person but for some reason the voices don't like her.

"I'm going to miss you, but this is for the best Tony." My mom sighed, she was talking about the hospital that she    is sending me to today. My mom claims that she's sending me there to get better but the voices say that she just wants to get rid of me. I don't blame her, I'd want to get rid of me too.

"Are you going to visit me?" I whisper asked.

"Yes, of course dear. I'll bring Jaime with me too." Jaime is my bestfriend, he's the only one who isn't creeped out by me. The voices like Jaime, a lot.

"That would be nice." I replied to my mom.

She thinks you're a freak.

She doesn't love you.

No one loves you.

At first I was confused at the voices random malevolent outburst, but the feeling was quickly replaced with sadness. The voices always say this to me but I know they're right. They are my friends and why would my friends lie to me?

"Do you have your clothes packed, mijo?" I loved when my mom called me mijo, it reminded me of when my dad used to call me it. I smiled at the bittersweet memory and went upstairs to grab my clothes. I came back down with my bag and waited for my mom to get ready.

"You ready?" My mom asked me. I nodded.

"Well.. let's get going." She sighed.

****

We pulled up to the driveway, there was already another car the car there to my surprise. We went inside and my mom filled out. I looked over to what I think is the rec room. Everyone looked fine but in tall, lanky boy caught my attention.

"Tony?" I looked over to see who was calling me.

"Hello, I'm Doctor McKinnon. Welcome to Birchwood." He held his hand out for me to shake.

Don't touch him.

He just wants to hurt you.

I kept my hand placed at my side and looked down.

"Okay...well it says here that your room is 201 which is just around the corner. Your roommate is Michael but he prefers Mike." I nodded just to show that I was paying attention.

"Here are your clothes and your wristband for identification. The color symbolizes why your here, for example green is for schizophrenia, which is what you have." He explained and handed me a bundle of clothes with a little green paper bracelet placed neatly on top. I went to my room to get changed. I walked out of my room and saw another boy with dark raven hair going to a room just down the hall from mine. His bracelet was a different color than mine. I stopped staring at the mystery boy and made my way back to Doctor McKinnon.

"Hey, what are the other colors and what do they mean?" I wanted to know what the raven haired boy could possibly be here for.

"We aren't allowed to give out that sort of information here." He said. I nodded. I guess that makes sense.

"You can sit in the rec room for now, I'll have one of the Fuentes boys lead you around." He explained and walked away, leaving me alone in the rec room.

They're all staring at you.

They know everything.

They think you're a creep.

I looked around at everyone in the room, no one was staring at me. I went to go sit down next to a small boy with curly brown hair.

"Hi, I'm Vic." He said quietly.

"Tony." I replied and put out my hand for him to shake. He stared at my hand for a moment before reluctantly shaking it, revealing scars on his arm similar to my own.

"I like your hair." I complemented him.

"I like your gauges." He complemented me back.

No he doesn't.

He just pities you.

I sighed to myself, this is going to be a long couple of months.