You are the reason .. (boyxboy)

6. honesty

Lukas POV
I never felt so nervous about talking to my best friend like today. Dannys mum let me in and told me to go up to his room. He was laying in his bed watching tv when i entered.
"well if it isn't Casanova" he said sarcastically.
"you are not funny at all you know that?"
"well i'm not the one waking up in Emilys bed"
"Dan, nothing happened.I talked to her and she just told me that"
"does that mean no stalking problems from her or can we expect problems again?"
"no..no more problems..she is fine..we are fine"
"wait you don't mean fine as in being with her?"
"NO! Jeez..what's wrong with you??"
"well sorry for not being sure about what to say. I know something is up with you and it's time you explain. You were jealous yesterday because of some picture and i never saw you like that before..talk to me Lukas"
I soo wanted to tell him everything, but how do you tell your best friend you are in love with his cousin? How do you explain you're in love with a guy? And that you are the reason for his crying.. I felt my heart beating like crazy. I set down on the bad and tried to focus.
"Lukas.. come on dude you are freaking me out..you know you can tell me anything "
I was sitting, leaning forward, hands covering my face and just focusing on breathing.
"just show me the picture that pissed you so much yesterday "
I knew this is it. I was afraid i will loose my best friend but i had to be honest. I took my phone, opened facebook and found the picture of Aaron and Dylan. I didn't look up at first. I just handled the phone to him. And nothing. Danny kept quiet so i just had to look up. He was completely calm. He wasn't surprised at what he saw, he just tapped my arm and said "start at the beginning ".
I told him everything. From the first time i saw Aaron till now. Everything. Without excusing myself. I explained how i f*cked up and when i started crying he hugged me. We stayed quiet for a few minutes before he started " i had a feeling something was going on. I didn't understand how you to just suddenly didn't get along. Last weekend i saw how you were looking at him, but i didn't want to intervene. I'm mad at you for not telling me before. I can't believe you were quiet just because you fell in love with a guy. And i'm mad because you hurt Aaron. You know last year was extremely hard for him. His mum died, his dad gave up on him, he had to move and you promised me that you will help me take care of him "
"i know" i said while tears were falling down my face again.."trust me i know"
"you need to fix this Lukas. You need to make it right "
"i'll try..but i think i'm too late"
"what?why?"
I took my phone again and looked for Aarons comment on facebook.
"that's why" i said giving him the phone.
"how about talking to him before assuming anything? As much as i know Aaron i doubt he would just find someone new, after crying for a week because of you "
"i hope you are right"
After that i stayed with Danny for the rest of the day. He texted Aaron asking when he is coming back. I thought about waiting for him at the bus station but Danny thought i should wait for him to come to my house later as planned. He thought i shouldn't push him so i agreed still not completely sure how i will fix everything.

Aarons POV
I was on my bus driving home. It was a good weekend. At least my friends knew what was up and i had someone who will be there to listen for whatever happens next. I always imagined my first love to be different. I wasn't bothered by the fact i fell in love with a guy instead of a girl. I kind of just embraced it. But i wanted a different storyline. I hoped for happier things happening. I wanted to love and be loved back.
There was still one small piece of my heart that believed in happy ending. I tried to be positive but just the thought of Lukas spending the night with Emily made me cry again. I called Emily yesterday but she didn't answer and she didn't call me back so i assumed she was with Lukas and had no time.
Great i was sitting on the bus and a lady sitting across was looking at me with pity in her eyes. She must have felt sorry for me crying like crazy. I tried to shut my thoughts up, so i took out my headphones from my backpack and turned the music on. Dylan uploaded a new playlist on my phone and it looked good.
I closed my eyes and focused on the music. It worked just fine until i heard Celine Dions You are the reason. Dylan knew it was my mums favorite song and he usually put it on every playlist. But i wasn't ready and i started crying again. What i didn't expect was the lady from before sitting next to me and hugging me. "it's ok sweetie..just let it out"
We talked later and she proudly showed me pictures of her grandchildren. She helped me forget everything else and i was really greatful for that.
Daniel was waiting for me at the bus station. There was something off with him, but when i asked him what it is he acted like he has no idea what i mean. I just knew he looked at me different.
"so how was your weekend?"
"it was great..yours?"
"not bad..great party friday night..but i wasn't drinking much"
"oh good for you.. you all went?" i asked trying not to look to interested.
"mhm.. Brian was completely waisted. He was dancing striptease and me and Liam stopped him just in time..he was about to take off his boxers "
"haha..great i go away for the weekend and miss all the good stuff "
"amm..well you seem to have good time too..considering your facebook activities "
I felt like he was asking for an explanation, but i convinced myself i miss understood,because he had no real reason to snoop.
"aha it was fun.."
"seriously Aaron do i really have to ask?"
"ask what?"
"who is Dylan?"
I blushed "oh that..he's one of my best friends "
"just a friend? i thought he had something to do with the in love comment "
"hihi..no, no..i didn't write that..girls did it when i was sleeping "
"oh i see". I had to look at him since his last comment sounded like he was really pleased with my answer.
"why do you wanna know Dan?"
"ahh..you know me..curious and all.. so what are you doing today?"
Oh shit..i completely forgot..i was supposed to see Lukas tonight..
"Aaron? you ok?"
"yeah yeah..i just remembered something "
Daniel looked at me expecting the answer.
"well i..i was supposed to work on the media project with Lukas tonight "
"oh that's great.. Is Lukas coming to our house?"
"a-a.. i'm going to his house "
"oh..so you will finally see he is a movie freak like you"
"a? what?"
" "just wait.. you'll see"

Lukas POV
I was almost seven and i was nervous like crazy..I changed clothes three times, cleaned my room and almost reorganized it completely. I still had no idea what to do. I just knew i needed Aaron in my room. I loved my room and i felt calm in it so i hoped the room will do the magic and make sure i stay calm.
"Lukas honey we are leaving " my mum said walking in my room. "I prepared snacks and lasagna is in the oven if you get hungry. Since this party usually gets out of hands we are staying in the hotel. Have fun and don't forget to lock the door ".She kissed me and left. Great we will be alone. I was still a complete nerve rack walking up and down my room untill i heard a doorbell. Shit..this is it..
I almost fell running down the stairs. I took one last deep breath and opened the door..

Aarons POV
Walking to his house i was nervous like never before. The whole afternoon i was thinking about what i'm gonna say. But while walking toward his house i forgot everything. I only knew i was determined to stop this pain he was causing.
So this is it. I took one last deep breath and rang the doorbell.

Lukas POV
I opened the door and froze. He was even more beautiful than i remembered. I just stared at him trying to calm down. I finally managed to speak.
"hi"
"hi"
I moved so he could enter. And when he did we touched for a second and i almost pulled him in my arms,  but i knew i needed to apologize first.
"my mum prepared some snacks, can you just help me take them to my room?"
"oh..i thought we were gonna work in the dining room?"
"it gets cold here in the evening..my room is a better choice trust me"
Trust me? Seriously..i ran away from him and i ignored him for a week and i expect that he trusts me..jeez i'm a sucker in choosing right words . I saw he twitched when i said it, but luckily he just nodded and followed me into the kitchen. We took some food and drinks and headed to my room.

Aarons POV
I was hardly breathing when he opened the door. I realized i was crazy in love with him. He was so beautiful and i knew nothing good can come out of this.
i was hoping we will stay downstairs but got the feeling he wanted me in his room. So i followed and when i walked into his room..oh wow..amazing..His room was awesome..even more than that..It was a room of my dreams..exactly what i would choose if i ever had a choice. His bed was lifted up. Underneath was a couch and a coffee table and if you sit there you were looking at the most amazing wall i ever saw. The whole wall had a drawing on..a drawing of Gryffindor common room..i just stood there for what seemed like forever. So sitting on the couch you had a feeling you are in Gryffindor. And that was all any Harry Potter fan would ever want.
"you like it?"
"like it? it's absolutely amazing..i never saw anything like that before..i wish i had something like that in my room..where..i mean who did it?"
"this are actually custom made wall paper.. my mum had it made for my birthday a few years ago. She thought i will get tired of them after some time but.."
"but you can never get tired of Harry Potter" i saw he was surprised i knew what he wanted to say.
"exactly "
I turned around to snoop around his room a bit more. His room was huge. He had a bit desk with laptop on it, shelfs full of books, of course one shelf was full of Harry Potter books and a guitar in the corner of the room.
"you play?" i asked looking at the guitar.
"mhm"
Seriously can he be even more perfect? i need to concentrate..
"so can we get to work? i don't want us to be too late "

Lukas POV
So i got him to my room. And boy i wanted to touch him so bad. He liked my room and was completely amazed when he saw my Gryffindor wall. It made me feel happy. I just needed him to like my room. And I needed him to like me again. After he scaned my room he looked at me seriously and asked me to start working.
And i still had no idea how to apologize.