In pieces | 2Jae

2, Car ride

3.42 am.

Jaebum leans against the back of his seat and closes his eyes. He's sharing a car with Jinyoung and Youngjae, so luckily, it's not going to be too loud unlike it would be in the other car. The leader feels a little bad for Mark who has to share the car with the maknaes and Jackson, but at the same time, he's glad he might be able to get some sleep.

Last night Jaebum ended up dozing off for a few hours. Every time he was about to fall asleep, a new thought came into his mind and forced him to think, making it impossible for him to sleep in peace. Sleeping in the car is not that comfortable, but they have to drive around three hours to reach the place where their next photoshoot is going to be. Why do the have to go that far you ask? Jaebum doesn't know either, apparently it has something to do with an abandoned warehouse and nature. Jaebum's pretty sure the only reason they are going so far is because they didn't have anything planned for this morning and JYP couldn't let them sleep in for once. Though their next schedule is near the photo shooting place so maybe this isn't a total hoax after all.

The leader opens his eyes to see what the other members are doing and is not surprised by what he sees. Youngjae who's sitting next to him is leaning against the window while listening to music and Jinyoung who's behind them is scattered on the three back seats. He's wearing his seatbelt, but since he's laying down it's pretty much useless... Jaebum doesn't bother to scold the younger about the unsafety of it, besides, Jinyoung is wearing headphones so he probably wouldn't hear a single thing Jaebum said. The oldest of the bunch sighs and puts in his earbuds copying the others. He closes his eyes and relaxes into the music, trying to fall asleep. Of course he hasn't slept the one time they have a photo shoot and it would be extremely important for him to not have any black circles under his eyes...

Jaebum's thoughts are interrupted by someone poking his arm. Jaebum opens his eyes and removes one of his earbuds as he sees Youngjae looking at him.
"What?".
"Hyung, did you come to my room last night?" Youngjae's question comes out of nowhere and Jaebum looks at him with wide eyes. Oh shit, how did he know? He wasn't awake was he? Jaebum keeps panicking inside his head, but he doesn't show any of it. No, he wasn't awake, he must've been dreaming. Jaebum raises his eyebrows and looks at Youngjae with confusion.
"No, why?"
Youngjae observes his Hyung's face to see whether he's lying, but he has no idea what Jaebum is thinking. Maybe if he could read the older one, he would've noticed his feelings already but to Youngjae, Jaebum looks like an empty book. He can't read any emotion Jaebum doesn't want to show.

"Ah hahaa I knew it was a dream, it was too weird to be real", Youngjae says mostly to himself but this perks up Jaebum. A smirk spreads on his lips and he raises his eyebrows.
"Did you perhaps... dream of me?" Jaebum teases and Youngjae turns pinkish.
"NO", Youngjae's answer is too loud and comes out too fast. As soon as he lets the word out, even he himself knows that Jaebum doesn't believe him.

"What did I do, tell me", Jaebum asks amused. He hasn't yet realized the truth about Youngjae's 'dream', but he was about to.
"You just came to my room and stood there for a while and then-" Youngjae cuts himself off and looks at Jaebum with wide eyes. Jaebum starts to see a familiar pattern on the younger's dream and he's desperate to hear the rest.
"And then what?" smile is still playing on the leader's lips but it becomes more uncertain by the moment.
"Gave me a goodnight kiss", Youngjae answers unclearly and if Jaebum hadn't known what the younger one was going to say, he most likely wouldn't have understood his fast words. But he knew and his breath hitches in his throat. Shit, he was awake. He couldn't have heard Jaebum's quiet words right? Youngjae seems to notice his hyung's reaction and quickly starts to explain himself.
"You kissed me on the forehead don't worry! I'm not that weird haha", Youngjae says quickly with an awkward laugh. Weird. Jaebum's heart gets crushed by his words. He can't stop the gasp leaving his lips and he doubles over as a pang of pain hits his insides.

Jaebum's eyes widen in shock. No matter what, he has never reacted like this. Sure, sometimes when he's alone he can't breathe because it hurts so much, he can't see anything and he just lies on the floor in a ball, but he has never shown his feelings like this in front of anyone. Usually, he's really good at hiding his emotions. So, he wonders, why can't he now?
"Hyung! Are you okay?" Youngjae asks eyes filled with concern, one of his hands placed on Jaebum's shoulder. The one in pain fixes his posture and blinks his eyes a few times while taking deep breaths.
"Yeah I'm fine don't worry, I hit my hand against something", Jaebum comes up with a quick lie and pretends to be observing his hand. He wrapped it in gauze to hide his wounded knuckles so they could heal properly and no one would question him. As they all were leaving, the condition of JB's hand was noticed and he told everyone he fell on top of it while he was going to the bathroom. Everyone believed his words and there is no reason anyone would think he hurt himself by punching the wall. Because nobody does that. Duh.

Jaebum stops paying attention to his hand and turns his eyes to Youngjae. The younger one is staring straight into his eyes, trying to see into his head and pull out the truth. This time Youngjae knows Jaebum is lying. Jaebum's hand was on his lap the entire time and as he suddenly doubled over, his hand stayed on his lap. If it was his hand that he hit, out of reflex he would've raised it up or taken a hold of it with his other hand, but he did neither. And on top of everything, he seemed surprised. He seemed like he had not expected the pain he felt and Youngjae wants to know why he felt that pain in the first place. So, he stares. He stares at Jaebum's face and observes him, trying to find something, anything. Jaebum grows more uncomfortable by the second and he turns his head away as he feels his blood rushing into his face. Finally, after Jaebum turns his face away, Youngjae gives up. He slumps back against his seat and looks at Jaebum, this time just looks without trying to examine him.
"Hyung, if you have something bothering you, you know you can always come to me right?" it isn't particularly easy to say these words but despite it being a little awkward, Youngjae feels like these are words that should be said. Jaebum nods his head with a smile and turns his attention away, putting back his earbuds. Youngjae copies him and soon the car is filled with silence once again.

Jaebum is worried. Youngjae has noticed something's wrong, he wouldn't have asked otherwise. He needs to upgrade his acting if he wants everything to stay hidden the way it's supposed to. Jaebum feels his thoughts turning into mush and finally the exhaustion takes over giving him sleep and freedom from his thoughts.