Cashby Cashby

Identity Disorder

Waking up next to your husband in your own warm bed is something I'll never grow tired of. We got home a few days ago and our sleep schedule is all fucked up. I rolled out of bed and into the bathroom. I brushed my teeth and opened the little cabinet to grab my hair straightener. I have to do this everyday because the salty water tricked my hair into thinking it could go curly. When I opened the cabinet though I noticed Austin's heart medication. I picked up the bottle and it was full. That's strange he's due for another prescription in a week...

Did he take his medication on the honeymoon? I stepped into our room and tapped his shoulder. I whispered,

"Austie, Austie did you take your meds on the honey moon?"

He opened his eyes and smiled and said,

"Of course I did."

I shrugged and went back in the bathroom. I warmed up the hair straightener and started doing my hair.
Austin came in and started laughing. I sprayed him with hair spray and said,

"Leave me alone!"

He kissed my cheek and said,

"I'll get you back later."

He brushed his teeth next to me and as I was finishing up with my hair he said out of the blue,

"Have you ever wanted kids, Alan?"

The question startled me and I dropped the straightener and went to catch it but burnt my hand.

"Fuck! Ow!"

Austin turned on the cold water and put my hand under it,

"Geez, Alan be careful!"

He unplugged my appliance and then walked me out of the bathroom and down stairs to where we kept the first aid kit. He examined my hand and said,

"Not too bad I'll just put a band-aid on it."

I nodded and watched as he put a bandage on me like I was a little kid...

"I think you'd make a wonderful father." I blurted that out... He smiled at me and said,

"We would make the best fathers ever.." And kissed my lips.

"I'm going to make breakfast. Do you want waffles?"

Austin stood up and said, "it's 1pm but sure."

I chuckled and pulled the waffles out of the freezer and popped them into the toaster. I heard Austin walk out the kitchen and I thought to myself.. Kids.. I've always wanted kids, but are Austin and I ready to take that next step? I mean we only just got married.

I took the waffles and put two more in. I nibbled on my waffles but dropped it when I heard a loud thud.

"Austin?"

I waited for a few seconds and then jumped again as the waffles popped out of toaster...

"Austin what was that noise?"

No response... I walked out of the kitchen and into the hallway and saw Austin laying face down on the floor. His body was all limp and...

"Oh god! AUSTIN!"

I knelt down and pushed him on his side and shook him.

"AUSTIN WAKE UP!"

His breathing was shallow but he wouldn't answer me..

"FUCK!" I got up and grabbed my phone and ran back over to Austin. Shakily dialed 911 and waited..

"911 what's your emergency?"

"Help! My husband fell down on the floor and now he's not responding to me I-I don't know what happened!"

"Is he breathing?"

"Barely!"

"Alright, sir were sending and ambulance to your location. Can you tell me you and your husbands names?"

"I'm Alan Ashby-Carlile and my husband is Austin Carlile."

The dispatcher woman on the line didn't speak for a moment then said,

"Don't worry Alan were going to save you husband."

I hung up and held his hand and kissed his fingers and whispered,

"It will be okay Austin it's gonna be okay I promise. Please don't die, we can adopt lots of babies and raise them to love our music or whatever music their into just please don't die.."

I leaned in close and his breathing was short and shallow... Dammit Austin! I kissed his cheek and whispered in his ear,

"I love you, Austin I love you so much.."

I heard sirens faintly but then they got louder and louder and then it heard someone banging on our door. I ran over and opened it and pointed towards Austin and the paramedics rushed towards him. They took his pulse and started spitting out medical terms. I told them,

"He hasn't been taking his heart medication half of his heart is fake and he has Marfan syndrome.."

They put him on a stretcher and put a bag thing to his face and started pining air into him. I followed them out the door and they said I could ride in the ambulance but I had to stay back.

I climbed in and watched as they started putting their hands all over him and they have him CPR and I just.. I was watching everything in slow motion and all I could think about was how perfect he is. I remembered what he looked like in the sun and how peaceful he looked in the water. I remembered what his tattoos looked like under the white sheets and how he looked when we...

"Sir! Tell us when was the last time he took his medication!"

I though about it... "Our wedding night. Two weeks ago."

They went back to working on him and soon we were at the hospital. They took Austin inside and I went to follow them but one woman stopped me and said,

"I need you to fill out this paper work for your husband."

I grabbed the clipboard and sat down in the waiting room. I started filling out the blanks.. How did this happen? He was perfectly fine and then all of a sudden he just... I pulled out my phone and called Phil.

"Hello?"

"Phil.. I- I'm at the hospital.. I need help."

"What?! Alan what happened?"

"It's Austin he just collapsed I think it's his heart I don't know what to do I'm scared.."

"Hold tight. I'll call the other guys and we'll be there soon."

I hung up and leant my head back. I waited but my thoughts were starting to get the best of me. I went up to the front desk and handed the clipboard back to the nurse and started pacing.

I started counting in my head... Counting and pacing counting and pacing.

"Sir, are you alright?"

"How is my husband is he okay?"

"Austin? Carlile... He was taken into emergency surgery. His heart slowed down and they couldn't get it to pick up a normal pace so the doctors are going inside to see what they can do."

I felt all the color flush from my face. I didn't know what to do, or say, but then I felt a pair of arms wrap around me and I recognized it was Phil.

"Alan! Are you okay!?"

"No t-they took Austin into surgery.."

Tino said, "hey man don't beat yourself up.. Austin is a fighter he's gonna make it through."

"I hope so.."

They took me and we all sat down in silence. I hate waiting. It's driving me insane. Aaron muttered,

"Today is going to be a loong day.."