Without you, I'm nothing

Chapter 16

Groggily, I forced my eyes open. The room was pitch black and I could feel a heavy weight across my stomach. Once my eyes had adjusted, I realised that Ben's arm was draped across my stomach and his head was nestled in the crook of my neck. I checked the time,it was 4am. Great. I guess Ben must have dissolved my sleeping pills in water. Ordinarily, I would have let him sleep but not today. I shook him vigorously until he stirred.

"Ben!" I said as loudly as I dared "Ben, wake up!"

"W-why?" He yawned as he snuggled closer to me

"Please wake up"

"I'm awake" He mumbled, his eyes were still closed"I'm awake"

"Ben" I shook him

"What? Let me sleep"

"No"

"Jon" He grumbled "Go to sleep"

"Ben, you drugged me which is why I'm awake right now"

"And?"

"And you're going to stay awake because it's your fault"

"I can't, I'm not tired"

"Go take some more pills"

"I can't be bothered"

"Then stop complaining" He moved his leg so it was in between mine, his toes were cold.

"Your feet are cold"

"More deoxygenated then cold"

"Deoxygenated?"

"My lungs don't work properly, which means that oxygen can't travel through my entire body. That's why my hands and feet are always cold" He explained "Sorry" He added as an afterthought

"It's okay"

"You're so warm" He pressed his fingers into my side, I shivered at his touch "Go to sleep, baby"

"I'll try"

"I love you"

"I love you too"

Ben fell asleep almost instantly but I couldn't get comfortable. Ben's grip was tight and his sleeping form was a heavyweight, trapping me. With great difficult, I slipped out of Ben's grasp and quietly snuck out of the room. Deadly silence followed me around the house as I walked aimlessly through. I could walk right out the front door if I wanted to, no one would know until morning. I could be back before anyone woke up and then no one would ever know. Wait, why did it matter if anyone knew? I could go wherever I wanted, whenever I wanted.

So I did.