From idol to boyfriend (COMPLETED)

Chapter 31

I arrive at the hill, it's night and I see whole New York. The last time I was here was with Shawn, that one time he showed me this hill, it was magical.

I take a seat on the ground and look at all the lights from the buildings and houses. I can't help it but I miss Shawn. The things we used to do together, like sitting here, kissing, hugging, just everything.

I close my eyes and clear my mind up. Suddenly someone is knocking on my shoulder. I turn around and look straight into someone's eyes. Wow, who is this?

"What are you doing here so late?" he asks. "Clearing up my mind" I sigh.

He takes a seat next to me and I've still no idea who he is. "And you are?" I ask. "Oh, that's right, I'm Matt." "Well, I'm Brooklynn."

"What are you doing here so late Matt?" "Same thing as you, clearing up my mind." We both have our own problems, but we share the same hill.

"Do you always come here when it gets too much?" He nods. "Most of the time I'm here at this time, usually there is no one around at this time." I get a little smile on my face. "Well, I'm here now." He rolls his eyes. "I said usually." "Yes, I know I heard it."

He gives me a friendly push and I laugh. "Why are you here? Can I ask you that?" he asks. Should I tell him about Shawn?

"My boyfriend and I broke up a few hours ago, how about you?" I see in his eyes he feels sorry for me, I don't know him but he seems like a really nice guy. "My father died 3 days ago."

I look at him and see his pain in his eyes. It sucks to see someone suffering. "I'm sorry.." I can't say more. Even thi I don't see my parents a lot I would cry so hard if they'll die.

"It's okay, I'm fine." I see he lies. "Come here." I give him a hug. "You don't have to lie, I know it's hard, losing someone you love" I say quietly.

"My father was my best friend, he was the best and now? Now he is gone in heaven. I miss him Brooklynn, I miss him so much." He looks at me and cries. "It's okay to cry, we all do, don't be ashamed of it."

It gives him a little smile on his face. I wipe his tears away and look into his ocean blue eyes. He is so hot, brown hair and ocean blue eyes.

"Thank you Brooklynn, the guy who dumped you doesn't know what he is missing." I hope Shawn does, I still hope that I get a message from him that he is sorry, but I know I won't get that message..

"That's sweet of you Matt." He comes closer with his face. Does he want to kiss me? He gives me a kiss on my cheek. "Thank you for being so nice Brooklynn, but it's late so I have to go."

I look at my phone, I have zero messages. But I see the time, 2:45 am. "Yes, I have to go too."

He reaches a hand out to me and I grab it. "Thanks." He smiles. "No problem." "New York is so pretty at night, what do you think?" "Yes, it is."

We talk about a lot of random things and then we are arrive at my house. "Well, this is my house so I see you later I guess?" "I know I don't know you, but can I have your phone number?" he says quietly. I roll my eyes and smile. "Of course silly!"

I give him my phone number. "Well, talk to you later then." I nod. "Bye Matt." He comes closer and gives me a kiss on my forehead. "Bye Brooklynn" and he leaves. This night wasn't terrible at all.

I enter my house and see that nobody is home, surprise! If I am alone I always call Shawn, but now I can't do that anymore, it sucks.

I scroll through some Instagram pictures and click on Shawn's profile. Still the same pictures with me and with his friends, but then I see he has posted a new one.

I click on the picture and he hugs a girl. Who is she and what is she doing with my Shawn? I read some comments and a lot of people are saying that they have a relationship. But Shawn and I only broke up a few hours ago?

I feel so terrible, he is moving on with his life. Memories are flashing by, that one time he surprised me at school, or that time he brought me to the hill and made food for me or that I joined him to Ibiza and he was drunk. I smile because I know it are only memories after all..

I take a shower and close my eyes. Matt is such a great kid. Does he have a girlfriend? I will ask him later.

I step out of the shower and look at my phone, one message: Shawn.

I can't deny it but I'm so nervous to open it. I click on messages and he has sent me a long message.

Brooklynn, I know I broke up with you a few hours ago and I know you're probably sleeping, but I can't live without you. I need you in my life, you changed me into the person I am today. I am so grateful to have you in my life. But how much I love you, I think we made a good decision with breaking up. You can always call me if you need a friend, I love you, forever, and that's the reason I have to let you go. I love you so much that it hurts. But I have to go now.

Love,
A person who always loves you ( Shawn ).

My heart stops beating. He doesn't want me back at all. I cry so hard because he wrote this so beautifully. I'm not going to send anything back, but he has to know that I love him too.

I head to my bedroom and lay in my bed. Still thinking about the message he has sent me. A part of me wants him back, but the other part doesn't.

Why is so life so complicated?