Letters To My Love

Thursday, 2nd February 2017

1.16 PM

I miss you.

Right now, I'm feeling as if our relationship is such a rollercoaster. We're fighting so hard one part of the day and we're loving the next. I guess that's just how relationships are. I've never been in a relationship like this before. Where you still love each other, but everything is working against you; the situations, timings and new people. 

I'm really glad we handled the fight yesterday almost like we used to handle fights. I think we're getting out of the rough patch, unless you still have more issues that you're not telling me. These letters are making it easy for me to share things with you. Things I couldn't have said to you face to face. Maybe that's what made things easy. The fact that the letters are easier for you to understand how I am feeling too, compared to me sharing them with difficulty in the moment.

I hope I get over this talking insecurity I'm going through. 

Also, I just discovered that it might be difficult for me to get this published–I might have to get myself a US tax card. I'm planning to give it for free at first but seeing as how I would only get an allowance which I'm spending on the instalment payment, I won't have any money to spend on myself.

No one would probably buy this anyway. It's a boring little book. Which only means something to the both of us. 

I suppose it's important to keep in mind that I agree with you on how our relationship is anything but boring. 

You're still the only person I love. Honestly the only person who keeps me happy. 

And the only person I can imagine ending up with. 

I've invested so much in you that I can't imagine working so hard for anyone else. You're who I want to be with. No one else. 

I think I should low key help the little Man in language. Since she's struggling with the subject and I did too at first but I found the loop hole to success.

Anyhow, I'm working on more books. I need to be more creative with them. It's so upsetting to think no one wants to read my stuff–sure, you guys do but you're all people I know. Imagine if I released a book and no one bought it off the shelf because they think it's lame. 

So I'm having a neck cramp. Can't look backwards to my right. 

I hope to see you later today. 

I love you a lot.

-Muffin.