Letters To My Love

Monday, 6th February 2017

10.47 PM

I appreciate you. Thank you for being around. I love you a lot. I know this break didn't turn out how we wanted and I don't write to you for days.

The pain's slowly starting to come now. On my foot I mean. It's bearable for now. I expect it to get worse later. I wish you were here. Online would suffice as well. I'm just–oh god it's wearing off. The anaesthesia's wearing off oh my god!

Well... it's getting worse by the minute...

At least once this heals, I won't have to suffer with this. Or what caused me to get surgery in the first place. 

My first surgery and it's on my foot. Well.

I feel like I keep getting my firsts all wasted on like, level 1 of everything. Like my x-ray was because I was having breathing difficulty. And my ECG because of my chest pain. Aaaaaaaand my CT scan because of my bad cramps.

Now, my first surgery and it's on my foot. While I lay awake and locally anaesthetised, chit chatting with the doctor. 

I hope I don't get my first time being admitted wasted on a bad fever–that would just suck. Level 1 on EVERYTHING.

I still can't get over how your friend people genuinely believed you and coffee barista boy had a thing unless coffee barista boy or someone close to him made that up. Your friends KNEW we've been together for more than an year now, they won't just believe something they hear out of the blue like that unless it's from a reliable source–WHICH IS VERY UNRELIABLE CAUSE IT'S NOT TRUE!!!!!

I can't believe Photograph of all people. I'm gonna cry. 

We meet him almost all the time...

God... Getting on to topic again, I miss you. I'm so glad you're around. I really wished they had let you in for the surgery thing 'cause of the attack thing. The surgeon's first reaction was "Oh!"

But he recovered I guess. 

Thanks for helping me with math. I think I've got this now. I'll let you see them tomorrow.

Oh my god...

I'm still worried about Uni how do I get up the stairs how do I move around I have 2 classes!

With such a huge gap...

Oh you're here. Okay... Hehe. Kinda nervous now...

I'm so sorry I don't write to you as much now. Sorry the break didn't work out like you wanted. I hope things are getting okay for you too... Cause you never really tell me if this is what you want or not and I overthink.

And... Um... Sorry I got frustrated during math. I don't like being told to change my formats...

I know you were telling me because it was important for me for later but I guess I was just in a snappy mood.

I'm sorry.

I love you a lot, love.

-Muffin.