Strings Attached

Chapter 66

Castiel isn't quite sure if he's awake right now. He certainly feels like it. He has the consciousness of being awake. But he can't feel anything. Well, no. He can feel something on him, almost like tape, but that's about it.

Castiel tries to open his eyes, but the light blinds him and he shuts them immediately with a groan. Why is it so bright in here? What's going on?

He hears a strange, distorted voice. What is it saying? He has to fight to understand it, and even then, he doesn't immediately recognize its owner.

"Cas? Cas, are you awake?"

Castiel makes a strange noise that even he can't describe, only knowing that he doesn't want to be awake. He wants to go back to sleep, where the bright light can't bother him.

"Cas? Cas!"

He can sort of hear the urgency as his hearing returns. He slowly opens his eyes again, squinting them to block out the light. He turns his head slightly, but it's a strange feeling. He doesn't feel right. It's almost as if he doesn't exist. He can't feel his own body.

He sees a boy sitting in a chair next to him. He hands are clasped in front of his face, his chin resting on them. They can't hide his nervous expression as he watches the boy in front of him.

"Dean?" Castiel croaks.

He can see the relief pass over Dean's face. "Oh my god, Cas," Dean breaths. "You're awake. Are you okay? How are you feeling?"

"Nothing," Castiel mumbles.

"What?"

"I'm feeling nothing," Castiel clarifies. "What's going on?"

"You're in the hospital," Dean explains.

"I'm... I'm what?"

"What do you remember?" Dean asks.

Castiel takes a moment to recall the events of the previous... Wait, what day is it now? Oh, whatever. What happened to him? What can he dig up in his mind?

"I remember, uh... This guy. Hen... Hendrickson. He... Oh, right. He made me choose, and I chose... You know I was never going to let him hurt you, right? I wasn't going to do that to you. I never actually picked you."

Dean nods solemnly. "I know. I should have known that's what you were doing. You've never been too keen on keeping yourself alive. But I hope you realize that was a stupid decision. You should have let him kill me, Cas. Then you wouldn't be stuck here like this."

"Why? At least now we're both alive," Castiel reminds him. "All of us are. Wait, we are, right? My brothers and sister? And Sam and Adam? Everyone's — everyone's okay?"

Dean nods. "We're all fine. I'm thinking some of them might end up with a therapist, but everyone's okay physically, at least. Well, not you, but what's new?"

Castiel chuckles at his attempt at a joke. "Yeah. I'm beginning to think of this place as my second home. Do you think I can get my own room?"

"You should ask," Dean replies. "I'm sure some of the nurses would love to have you. They seem to love you here."

"Yeah, we're — we're tight."

"Probably not a good thing," Dean replies. "Oh, uh, your dad is coming back. Someone called him, and I'm pretty sure he's going to break a quite a few speed limits getting here to see you. The nurses kicked everyone out, but I snuck back in."

"I'm glad you did," Castiel tells him. "I don't know what I would have done if I woke up here alone. Actually, I probably would've gone back to sleep. Getting shot is exhausting."

"I'm sure it is," Dean agrees. "But, on the bright side, the bullets missed any major arteries, and you'll be okay, just like always. Although I keep hearing nurses suggesting therapy, and I don't think they mean PT."

Castiel groans. "No way. I am not getting a therapist."

"You may not have a choice," Dean tells him.

"Great. Just great. So when I don't want to choose, I have to choose, but when I do want to choose, I don't get to choose."

Dean chuckles at his views on life. "Yep, basically. But you managed to rig the game last time. I'm sure you'll find a way to get your way now, too."

"Here's hoping," Castiel agrees. "What day is it, by the way?"

"Sunday," Dean replies. "It's only been a day. Like, sixteen hours or so."

"Sixteen hours," Castiel repeats. "That's... That's not bad, I guess."

"It was the worst sixteen hours of my life," Dean tells him. "Not knowing when or if you were going to wake up, or if you were going to remember anything... It was horrible. I'm so glad you're okay, Cas." He leans over and gives Castiel a kiss. "I should probably go get a nurse, huh?"

Castiel looks up at him with puppy dog eyes. "Don't leave me yet," he murmurs. "Stay. Please. Just a little bit longer."

Dean nods, a small smile on his face as he pulls the chair closer. "Of course, Cas," he replies. "You saved my life. It's the least I can do."

Castiel reaches out with his hand, though it's hard with the IV in his vein. Dean takes his hand, holding it in both of his own. And though Castiel is lying in a hospital with three bullet holes in him, he feels happy. He's here with Dean. What more could he ask for?