How Can I Ever Get Past This

How Can I Ever Get Past This Chapter 23

Chapter 23

"So what's the big problem with you going to see your mom?" Josh asked. We had gone back to my dorm and we were just sitting on the bed hanging out.

"What do you mean? There is no problem." I told him

"Come on Syd, you were trying to dodge her anyway you could."

"I've told you over and over not to call me that." I replied with an attitude although I didn't mean for it to come out that way.

"Sorry," he said looking at me slightly confused. "So what's up with you and your mom?" he asked

"Nothing's up with us, we just don't talk that much. I don't even know why she wants me to come down." I said in an aggravated tone.

"Maybe because you're her daughter Sydney." he replied. So was he a counselor now?

"Whatever she was never at home when her "daughter" lived with her or she never called to check up on her "daughter", instead she was out doing her job, which is nonetheless sleeping with her coworkers and boss"

"So you're mad at her?" He asked simply

"No I'm not, I just don't care anymore" I replied. He just stared at me for a few seconds before talking again.

"You blame her for what happened." He asked and told me at the same time.

"No I don't, it's just.... can we get off this subject?"

"You know talking about it makes you feel better because you are getting it off your chest and you know you can talk to me about anything."

"I know" I said. He cupped my cheek and kissed me.

"Why do you have to be so great?" I asked him

"You make me great" He replied

"Good Answer" I told him

I was packing my clothes in my duffel bag for our trip to Tallahassee and Tampa. I didn't really want to go. The weather in that region had been bad lately with lightning and thunderstorms and a bunch of rain. I told them that maybe we should just stay put but obviously they thought otherwise and just figured that I was trying to avoid my mom.

That was the case but the weather truly was bad and most likely the concert would be canceled. If there was a cancellation it would be posted on the sight, so for the past few days me checking the site occupied most of my time. I put the last few items that I would need into my duffel. Finally done. We were leaving tomorrow morning and we would arrive at mom's house around noon and then we would be spending the night and then It would be Saturday the concert started that night at seven but we were going to get there earlier to ride rides.

"You all packed?" I heard Josh say as his arms circled around my waist.

"I guess so" I turned around to face him with his arms still around my waist.

"Come on Sydney, I'm sure it won't be that bad"

"Maybe not, since you will be there" He smiled and kissed my forehead.

"I'm going to take these bags down to the car so we can be all set tomorrow. I'll be back okay?" he said placing a kiss on my lips. I nodded

I was laying in the bed with Josh's arms wrapped around me. He was asleep, but I wasn't. I thought back to what he said. "You blame her for what happened". Did I blame her. I don't think I did. Yea she could of been at home more often and then maybe she would have been there so Nate wouldn't have tried anything with me. I didn't blame her though. It wasn't her fault. I just wish that everything would Nate had never happened. I just wanted someone to be there for me after it did happen, but no one was.