The Sickness in Love

The Sickness {part 2}

     After five years of being married and having our dreams come true, we decided it was time to plan a family together. But planing a family takes a lot of work and time, which we don't have. Along with working daily hours and night shifts, we wouldn't find the time to even get comfortable enough to even try to. Besides, we only get a hour for dinner and an hour for lunch, not counting the times I needed to sleep from all the stress. We never saw each other besides stopping by the house.

Today was March 16, 2005; my first patient. A tall, white man, with beautiful blue eyes. He had fallen 10 stories and only had a few wounds. Which still remained a mystery because he had fell 10 stories to his death. His name; Noel Bush. A fellow member of the Navy and ex Vice President of the United Stated. A person the world needed the most. And, I, of all people, had the the weight of the world, holding onto my hands. Every time I've touched Noel, it was like baking a pizza. I didn't know how to roll the dough, didn't know how long to cook it and didn't even know how to add the toppings.
But, he was up and running right before Easter. Which was good timing, since he needed to fly to Canada for a meeting. You might be thinking, Why am I talking like I did when I was back in high school. Why am I giving so many details about an injured man, that I know nothing about. But I did know him. He was my brother in law, a fellow friend and an ex. Which weren't a big deal at the time of the marriage.
Before he walked out of the ER, he asked for my number, and being a doctor and all; I had to give it. I wasn't proud of what I did but I'm a doctor and he was my patient. I've seen him everyday at work and even at night when I was on break. I had started to fall for him, over time. Couldn't help not looking into his beautiful blue eyes, those soft lips that might've touched created by an angel. His hands, they were softer than anything I've ever touched and his smile. Don't even get me started on how he said my name as he woke up from coma. His voice made chills run down my back. Which never happened before.
After leaving the ER, Noel and I kept in touch. We would text so much that Jack got jealous; and had to tell me that if I don't stop texting another man when I'm at home, he would leave me. Which scared me a bit, because I love Jack but I also love Noel. I have feelings for Noel that I didn't have with Jack. Sure, I'm in love with Jack, we met in high school but we were to young to understand what real love was. With Noel, I've figured out what my relationship with Jack, was missing. We weren't going out anymore or even fooling around. But; I knew Jack is always busy and never home because he was in the army. He went in as a cop and would come back, knowing how to fight better. I've had to tell Noel a lie, which I didn't mind because Jack was never home and wouldn't know, I would be dating. No one needed to know that Noel was staying at the house. Enough talk about my husband and my boyfriend. Which no one knew about.
Noel and I, had been going out for an year now and I've felt happier. I had someone that cared a lot about me and was there when I needed to talk. Jack had been gone for a couple months, but I wasn't hopping to re-see him after Noel and I get married. It's still a process in mind but I want him so bad. He's told me lots of times that he doesn't believe in getting married. Which had me thinking; why should we? But then it hit me, I'm scared of losing him to someone else and being married means there's no chance of him getting with another. But, I did. I've ruined the only real marriage I've had. Why? Because my husband was away for years on in, and I got lonely. Which you might think is selfless. Why cheat if I'm lonely? Well I don't see it as cheating, because Noel never touches me. I've seduced him a few times in the past but nothing to serious. We've fooled around but he had never touched me inappropriately. Besides, I would never ask him to. Unless it was my birthday and we had planed to.
    April 19, 2010; Noel and I had been waiting in the waiting room for some time now. Not knowing what would happen in the end. "Mrs and Mr. Bush" the doctor called from the door. As we walked through the first set of doors, I could feel Noel's heart sink. He was scared to death and so was I.